1999-2010

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Howard Stern regular dies and nobody hears


If a
Howard Stern
sidekick

drops dead
and nobody
hears about it,

is he really dead?



Well, it's happened, but who would know? Or care? Gosh, has it really been that long since Howard was relevant-- or even real? For you younger readers growing up in an aural wasteland dominated by the likes of the surprisingly pliable and recently feminized monotonal bore Adam Carolla (he now plays the “modern woman” to his pre-liberation sidekick Teresa Strasser and Eighties pop culture gal “Bald Brian”) there was a time when the radio personality was a vital force in pop culture, with his radio show debated on television and in print and the comings and goings of his subsidiary characters like Jackie The Jokeman and Stuttering John treated like characters on a radio reality show.

But since Howard sold out his fans and moved to private pay radio, he works in a vacuum. Forgotten by the mainstream and occasionally popping up in the media few days after the fact, thanks to a vigorous PR efforts and public displays of inebriation by his pathetic sidekick Artie Lange (whose phony on-air explosion and possible "firing" was an obvious publicity stunt before a vacation a couple of weeks back), whose sad claim to fame is being at the top of most Celebrity Death Pools.

But another Stern player has beaten Artie to the punch. Kenneth Keith Kallenbach, the hippie burnout who parlayed his Stern exposure into other appearances, died in jail last week (he'd been arrested for pulling an underage girl into his car-- looks like Howard didn't bail him out). The death was announced Thursday on Howard’s private show, but news from Stern's hideout travels as quickly as it did in the days of Pony Express.

Who would know if we didn’t mention it here?

31 comments:

Anonymous said...

very weird.

Anonymous said...

Did the lone commenter that told you that Carolla had "recently feminized" a few months back also tell you that Perez Hilton has appeared on the show semi-regularly ever since Adam Carolla got the show?

tb fan said...

Au contraire, anon 1:33. In the old days, The Ace Man had "gay stereotypes" on the show so he could mock them. Now The Ace Hole targets a new demographic with the inclusion of every girl's BFF, Bald Bryan, and T's wedding instead of T's V.

Anonymous said...

this isn't about that douche carolla it's about kkk.

rip.

Anonymous said...

Still posting as "tb fan," eh Tabloid Baby? Sad. If you ever listened to the show, although you claim you don't, you would know that Perez Hilton filled EXACTLY the same role on the show as Lynn & Alex, who you recently said demonstrate Carolla's feminization. Your desperate claims are truly clueless.

tb fan said...

Sorry, anon 10:02 but I'm not "Tabloid Baby." I can prove it but it won't matter. But you seem to be a sexually-Why are you so hung up on whether Adam is femme? Do you love him? That DWTS thing did it, didn't it?

Anonymous said...

On yesterday's show, instead of talking about the NFL draft, the Assman talked about Dancing with the Stars and Miley Cyrus.

Case effing closed.

Anonymous said...

"But you seem to be a sexually-" Let me introduce you to the English language. What in hell are you trying to type?

Anonymous said...

Tabloid Baby, keep on posting as "tb fan" (really, you think anyone buys that?) and anonymous and maybe someone somewhere might buy it. We're not. And, by the way, you seem to be listening to Carolla quite a bit lately for someone who has a personal vendetta against him...

Anonymous said...

^ Hey, lunchtime loonie (aka 12:55 pm). I post as anonymous. And I'm not TB. Whadduyuh gonna do about that?

Anonymous said...

Wow. You sound tough. And smart. Hehe. But we know who you really are.

tb fan said...

Yeah, "hehe," lunchtime loonietune. I post as TB Fan and I'm not Tabloid Baby either so how do you like them apples?

Anonymous said...

Uh huh.

Anonymous said...

Didn't we already establish that "tb fan" was Tabloid Baby?

Anonymous said...

hehehehehehehehehehe

Adam's doctor and zen guru, Jimmy Kimmel, said the mean people on the internets won't hurt as much if you call them by one name.

Excuse me now, I have to go feed my ego.

Morning fan

tb fan said...

Anon 10:43 we established DEFINITELY that I am NOT Tabloid Baby, but that YOU are a DOOSH!

Anonymous said...

You do realize that waiting a half hour between posting as "anonymous" and "tb fan" doesn't fool anyone, right?

tb fan said...

Anonymous 1:26 are you really such a bald bryan that you think you and i are the only ones who follow tb? this site is linked to carolla, stern-- even neil innes fanboards! get a fucking life loser.

tb rules!

and i ain't him!

I mean

HE.HE.HE!

Anonymous said...

As someone once eloquently said, "But you seem to be a sexually-Why are you so hung up on whether Adam is femme?" Wait, that was you.

"this site is linked to carolla, stern-- even neil innes fanboards!" Uh, no its not. Go check. Let's stop and think before we begin typing with our forehead again, eh?

tb fan said...

anon 3:50, you seem to be a sexually-- Why are you so hung up on TB? And why are you such a moronic liar?

Face the facts, bald bry:

carolla:

http://mahalo.30.forumer.com/index.php?s=0b0adacc08378fa60dc65c3487c44e85&act=Search&f=2

stern:

http://www.SternFanNetwork.com/forum/showthread.php?s=63a70b2379a87364aaa499bb19e5d083&threadid=362295

innes:

http://www.neilinnes.org/innesboard/viewtopic.php?t=2409

now don't go away mad, just blow me!

Anonymous said...

The english language is clearly not your friend. So you typing out those links means what? Tabloid Baby itself still doesn't link to them - you do understand that, don't you?

P.S. Judging by all your references, glad to hear you are enjoying the Carolla show.

tb fan said...

Anon 6:58 am You have to get up pretty early in the morning to fool me! TB.com might not link to those fanboards-- but THEY LINK TO TABLOID BABY.

Give up, fanboy. It's very weird that you're so obsessed with TB (almost as obsessed as I am! And i'm NOT TB! hehe!)

But seriously, you seem to be a sexually-Why are you so hung up on TB?

Anonymous said...

"TB.com might not link to those fanboards-- but THEY LINK TO TABLOID BABY."

Actually, not one of them links to Tabloid Baby. Search for yourself. It might be time to put the headgear back on, little guy. You seem to have trouble stringing a coherent thought together.

Give Burt my best.

Anonymous said...

who is tb fan

Anonymous said...

who is the 'anonymous' who keeps arguing with tb fan?

Anonymous said...

"tb fan" is Tabloid Baby, who also comments as "anonymous" on his own posts.

Howard said...

Anon 404 pm, give it a break, dude. You're really coming off as a hysterical stalker of some kind. Tabloid Baby have denied posting anonymous comments, and TB Fan has taken credit. So why are you beating this tired horse? What does it prove?

And why would Tabloid Baby comment on their own posts? It doesn't make sense.

Head on back to the Carola Show fan boards. Your mission is accomplished, friend. We all get the point.

Anonymous said...

^ another Tabloid Baby post. Flexing those creative muscles now - it is "howard" now Burt? You are only fooling yourself...

BTW, the only people visiting this dated post are Tabloid Baby/tb fan/anonymous/howard and those of us who enjoy watching you get worked up.

tb fan said...

Dude you have no effing clue.

And obviously NO IDEA who I am.

hehehe.

Anonymous said...

Aside from you listening quite often to the Adam Carolla Show, the way you butcher a simple sentence tells us all we need to know, Sparky.

Anonymous said...

Howard is very relavent, and he talked about this death a lot on the show. Moron.