Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Britney's pap rats return to Malibu

On the first day of the Malibu fire, as tragedy lurked in the hills, we had a bitter laugh reading the corporate porn-pushing gossip site TMZ.com's updates on whether Britney Spears' house had been evacuated. And as fire consumed homes and smoke covered the area, our pal who lives on the Pacific Coast Highway called to say that one bright side of the disaster was the disappearance of the cavalcade of paparazzi in SUVs that follow his neighbor Britney back and forth from her driveway, day after day (above).

A few weeks ago, he'd told us he was heading home from work when traffic slammed to a stop not far from his house. "Britney Spears was pulling into her driveway," he said. "And all of a sudden, these two SUVs crash over the center divider, with paparazzi holding cameras out of the sunroof! And one of them is speeding right at me!" Our pal was forced to maneuver into someone's bushes. He got out to kick some ass, but after one youth with a camera squeaked, "We're only doing our jobs," he was convinced to settle for tag numbers. Our pal filed a report at the Lost Hills Sheriff's station. "When someone gets killed," he announced, "I want it on the record that you've been warned."

On that first fire day, we linked to the Here in Malibu site for updates, and found an earlier entry in which writer Veronique de Turrene complained about the ever-present Spears caravan on the PCH and swarms of "pap rats" in the local coffee shops whenever Britney heads out for a latte. She posted that photo of their constant stakeout.

Today, the New York Observer reports that now that the PCH has been reopened, the paps are back on the side of the road, ready to play Baby Diana with a mentally ill former pop star.

We didn't expect one of the locals to pick up the story. They're lining up to buy the photos.

Fires rage, soldiers die, candidates line up, scandals bubble under the entertainment industry, and the powerful, Botoxed grownups who run the celebutainment industry play hide-and-seek with little girls.


Anonymous said...

great post..

Appalachian Lady said...

I agree, great post.

Your pal is right. The police do indeed need to be placed on notice, and the complaint put on the public record, for the benefit of whoever eventually gets maimed or killed by the paparazzi stalking Britney. The paps may have a right to do their jobs, but they don't have the right to place other drivers in danger (including Ms. Spears).

This is especially true if gossip sites are employing kids to do a job of that nature. After all, there's probably a reason they're hiring kids, and I'd guess that reason is that kids are far more reckless and more willing to take dangerous risks in order to get the picture.

I also find it disgusting that TMZ is constantly insulting a mentally ill young mother. It's incredibly sick, and there's just no other way to view it. Given the ages of her children and the fact that they were born so close together, she's probably suffering from some form of postpartum depression, and that's a very dangerous medical condition. Even TMZ readers are becoming alarmed and/or disgusted at the sheer extent of their Britney coverage, and imploring TMZ to stop.

However, they won't stop, unless people stop visiting their website. Money talks, after all, and it's the only language TMZ knows.

Anonymous said...

" Even TMZ readers are becoming alarmed and/or disgusted at the sheer extent of their Britney coverage, and imploring TMZ to stop."

So amazing. Maybe there's hope for America after all. I love me some gossip, but the dangers of driving on that stretch of PCH will lead to tragedy. When, not if.