Dina Lohan gets her reality show

The following news release showed up in the Tabloid Baby mailbox this morning. Lindsay Lohan's mother is getting her reality show on the E! network. This was the reality show originally called "Momager" that she was hawking and filming while her golden gosling Lindsay was in rehab-- the one in which she pimps out her two youngest kids onto the Hollywood tray the way she served up Lindsay. This is is a big reason the inspirational reality show featuring her ex-husband Michael Lohan (see the trailer at the right of this page) never got any traction. A few years ago, people would have called Child Services to take a good look at a woman like this.  Nowadays, they just give her a reality show so we can all look and feel superior while a couple of more Lohan kids hop onto the sled to Hell.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
E! ENTERTAINMENT TELEVISION ANNOUNCES NEW NONSCRIPTED SERIES
STARRING CELEBRITY MOM DINA LOHAN AND DAUGHTER ALI LOHAN

Bunim-Murray Productions and Maloof Television Present "Living Lohan" (Working Title), Debuting Summer 2008 on E!

Los Angeles, CA, March 4, 2008 – E! Entertainment Television will debut a new nonscripted series starring celebrity mom extraordinaire Dina Lohan and her youngest daughter, up-and-coming teen star Ali Lohan (14). Viewers will go inside the Lohan's Long Island home for the first time to follow Dina as she works double duty as mom and manager to help Ali try to follow in her big sister's famous footsteps and pursue her own shot at stardom. Co-produced by Bunim-Murray Productions and Maloof Television, "Living Lohan" (Working Title) will debut summer 2008 on E!

Dina has faced intense scrutiny over the past year due to daughter Lindsay's (21) highly publicized mishaps and her long-simmering divorce from her ex-husband. But the Lohan family has demonstrated great resiliency and, with Dina at the helm, they are moving on with their lives. Dina is determined to help each of her four kids fulfill their dreams and refuses to live in fear of what others may think, despite being under the paparazzi microscope.

E!'s cameras will follow the single mom every step of the way as she manages Lindsay's hectic schedule, while helping Ali jump start her music and acting career. This takes the family to the Palms Casino in Las Vegas, where Ali will record tracks for the Maloof's Interscope-based record label. Having grown up in the shadow of her sister's stardom and much publicized lifestyle, Ali is determined to achieve her own brand of success. But Dina is more experienced this time around and will do everything she can to protect Ali from the pressures and temptations of young Hollywood.

The series will also feature Dina keeping track of her son Cody (11) whose sports teams, homework and endless energy are enough to keep any soccer mom busy, as well as her older son, on-the-go college student Michael (20). Viewers will get to know the Lohan's close-knit extended family as well.

"The Lohans are one of the most intriguing families in the entertainment industry today," said Lisa Berger, Executive Vice President, Original Programming and Series Development for E! "This is a family that knows how to roll with the punches and come out on top. Dina is an incredibly hard-working, passionate mom that I think our viewers will find both relatable and highly entertaining."

"We are excited to be in business with the Lohan family and E! and look forward to a memorable series," said Phil Maloof, Chairman and CEO, Maloof Productions. "This series will provide an entertaining and unprecedented look at one of the most recognized families in America."

"We've been given unprecedented access to Dina Lohan and her kids lives; as a result, our series will deliver a powerful story that will both surprise and delight E!'s viewers," said Jonathan Murray, President, Bunim-Murray Productions.

TMZ makes up a story about Lindsay Lohan

How does a corporate porn-pushing gossip site manned by subliterate dirty-minded keypunch operators churn out thirty or so smarmy items a day? In the case of TMZ.com, besides relying the flow of big bucks from its corporate overlords at AOL and Time Warner (the folks who bring you CNN, by the way), THEY MAKE IT UP.

The West Hollywood rentboys gave away the game this morning with their story on Lindsay Lohan and her supposed slide back into drinking and drugging with her pal, the Pete Doherty lookalike Samantha Ronson. In wake of our report on the need for Lindsay to take her father's advice, Page Six's report on her NYC antics and People's latest scoop on little sister Ali, TMZ came up with an "exclusive" of its own:

Lindsay Drinks 'Cause Her Parents Stink
Posted Apr 22nd 2008 11:50AM by TMZ Staff

Sources tell TMZ the source of Lindsay Lohan's recent downslide is her parents.

We're told Lindsay has been humiliated by her dad Michael going on national TV saying he got shortchanged in his divorce case. He's on a campaign trashing Dina. As for Dina, Lindsay can't believe she's pimping out Ali on a reality show. We're told that is what led Lindsay to hit the bottle Saturday night in NYC.

Ironically, we're also told Lindsay has been taking sobriety seriously, requesting a sober companion on the set of her new film. People around her are telling her not to go to clubs but she's ignoring them -- but it's not because she wants to party. Lohan is really really tight with DJ Samantha Ronson, who works in clubs -- and Lindsay is there for Sam, not the scene.

Will Lindsay go back to rehab? No plans just yet. Will she downslide or conquer? Stay tuned.

"Stay tuned?"

BULL-SHIT!

"Sources tell TMZ?" "We're told?" "We're also told?"

TMZ's use of phony "sources" is one of the oldest tricks in the tabloid book, but just as the flaccid "TMZ staff" of shaved bronzed midget frontman Harvey Levin is graceless in its use of words and attempts at double entendre, so does it fail in its use of conjecture to create a story that's logically possible, can't be denied, and ultimately will be self-fulfilling. This phony "scoop" is such an obvious space-filler that it makes Liz Smith look like Mike Walker.

If ever a story was obviously made up out of whole cloth, it's this one. Who among us is going to believe that 21-year-old actress, who's been out of control for years and managed to withstand two or three attempts at rehab and is now in the middle of a dark party crowd, is reacting to the antics of her parents, who seek her approval, not the other way around?

No, this one is an obvious public relations sop to take the heat off of Lindsay in a matter that the young adult should be forced to take responsibility for--if only to save her life. Daddy, for one, only wants to help, but once again TMZ can't sort out the heroes from the villains. The TMZ staff might be better served reading the new Chris Farley biography or better yet, this.

Meanwhile, sources tell us: What a load of bull-shit!

ALERT: Why does TMZ care about Lindsay Lohan all of a sudden?

All of a sudden the corporate porn-pushing gossip site TMZ.com cares about Lindsay Lohan? After years of harassing, intruding, taunting, bothering and humiliating the talented, troubled, hard-partying, hardly working actress, they run an "exclusive" story that her drug use is out of control and she may be near death?

What's their game? Lindsay's father Michael Lohan has been shouting that fact from the rooftops for three years now. We've raised the alarm on a regular basis (as seen below).

Is it a coincidence that the shaved bronzed midget frontman and his toddler army run this "exclusive" story the very same week we threw up our hands and suspended our long-running Lindsay Lohan Watch, that Michael Lohan threatened physical harm paparazzi who endanger his daughter, and a former employee sued the sleaze operation, alleging drug and booze use and harassment?

What do they know? Is TMZ about to be implicated in something? We know they don't care about Lindsay Lohan's health, so why now?

Developing...

Exclusive! Michael Lohan is getting out of prison

Michael Lohan,
father of superstar actress
Lindsay Lohan,
is set to walk out of prison
at 9 a.m.
on Tuesday, March 13th--
and into the reality TV show
he’d left behind
more than two years ago.

The controversial Lohan, who’s scheduled to be released after two years in the Collins Correctional Center near Buffalo, N.Y., will be feted at a "welcome home" party at his mother's home in Long Island. But the former stockbroker, producer and actor is definitely not the same man who was hauled away amid restraining orders and probation violations. Once known as the "Hollywood Dad from Hell," he's now an ordained minister, ready to spread the word and “make amends for his past mistakes."

“Michael Lohan is a changed man,” says the show's producer Brett Hudson, who along with Lohan’s mother has been the only one to keep in regular contact with Lohan in stir. “I've spoken to him often and I know it. The last time around, Michael would never admit he’d done anything wrong. Now, he not only admits his past mistakes, but he wants to right the wrongs he’s done. And most of all, he wants to get his family back on track."

It was two years ago that Hudson and the team at Frozen Pictures were filming a reality TV series pilot around Lohan called “Hollywood Dad.” At the time, Lohan was best known for his hunger for the spotlight, his altercations (with in-laws and a sanitation worker), passing out at Scores nightclub and his intensifying battles with his estranged wife (and Lindsay’s manager), Dina. After surviving a fiery DUI car crash on Long Island, he was sentenced to prison.

While checked into the Gray Bar Hotel, Lohan was ordained as a minister. “He’s serious about it,” says Hudson. “He’s actually going straight into the ministry when he gets out-- the Teen Challenge ministry to help runaways and kids on drugs— trying to straighten out their lives.

“But he’s still Michael in more than one way. He’s still very creative. You can see where Lindsay got her drive and her talent. He has a few reality shows he wants to pitch-- including one in which he and Lindsay are put on a desert island with Paris Hilton, Jessica Simpson and their dads. We’ll be going along when he does that. We’ll be with him when he tries to ‘save’ some of his old Hollywood pals.

“And he’s got other ideas, like going out on Sunset Boulevard and giving a prostitute a hundred dollar bill-- not for sex, but for her time so he can talk to her and try to save her. He wants to make things right with the world. And especially with his family."

In January, Lohan wrote his daughter a letter, asking forgiveness and a reconcilitation. Life & Style magazine reported last month that Lindsay is in favor of it.

"It’s a fascinating look at the price of fame— and what it does to a family,” says Burt Kearns, Hudson’s producing partner. “Two years ago, Michael was Bonaduce, Sizemore, the Diceman and Bobby Brown rolled into one. But his heart was always in the right place. God knows what he'll be like now that he's got religion. This was a great project in 2004 and it’s even better now. Because Michael’s better now.”

Tabloid Baby's 2007 Person of the Year

He began the year in prison. He ended the year co-starring as Joseph with a plastic Baby Jesus in a live-action nativity display in the middle of Times Square and featured on television and in magazines as an agony aunt dispensing advice to the family of Britney and Jamie Lynn Spears. And those aren't the only reasons we made...

TABLOID BABY'S
2007
PERSON OF THE YEAR
Michael Lohan

When Michael Lohan went off to prison in 2005, no one expected that Lindsay Lohan’s troubled father would emerge two years later as a new man with a new mission, setting out not only to reconcile with his daughter and reconnect with his family, but to save others from falling into the same traps that destroyed his own life. And certainly few would expect that he would remain in the tabloid headlines, day after day, week after week in 2007, with new surprises and outrages, sometimes teetering on the brink of ridiculousness, often falling over the edge, but always with an optimistic message that had us chuckling or shaking our heads.

The year of Michael Lohan was a grown-up parallel story to the chaotic chain of kiddie carwrecks, confrontations and McConaughey-perving rolled out by TMZ. Lohan’s was a story with consequence, with much more at stake than his long-awaited-- and unexpectedly successful-- reunion with his daughter Lindsay. There was his emergence as a mail order minister, his work with the Long Island Teen Challenge youth program, his bitter war with his ex-wife Dina, followed by their unlikely reprochement. His plans to open a celebrity drug rehab center in the Hamptons were matched by his blueprints for a restaurant in Los Angeles, where Lindsay could continue to party under his watchful eye.

And Lohan struggled in public, as well. When the pitch reel for the Michael Lohan Reality Project (above) was leaked to YouTube (receiving more than 100,000 hits within hours), Lohan, in fear of offending Lindsay, denied the show existed. While “working for God,” he was spotted treating his new girlfriend to a posh shoe-shopping spree. And all along, he's been on parole, walking that line uneasily, being fitted with a GPS ankle bracelet, living under curfews and the constant threat that a wrong move could send him back to prison.

Considering all those escapades-- not to mention the Writers Strike that has made unscripted programming so crucial to television networks-- every executive who passed on the idea of the Lohan reality series should be strapping him or herself to an ass-kicking machine.

Lohan's road is a bumpy one and he is the poster boy for taking life one day at a time. But we look forward to new grand schemes and projects, more unexpected headlines, and possibly, his testimony in the lawsuit trial of Frozen Pictures’ Lindsay-related lawsuit against the X-17 paparazzi agency (Scoop: We hear the action is being revised next week to seek damages around the $1 million mark). And with the reality series on the back burner for now, he’s also at the center of a new film documentary on the wages of fame, now in production from our pals at Frozen.

Michael Lohan launches a website

Michael Lohan, Tabloid Baby's Person of the Year for 2007, is winding up 2008 by starting his own website. The father of once-promising actress Lindsay Lohan and star of the best unsold reality show in the history of television (produced, incidentally, by our pals at Frozen Pictures), has launched MikeLohanOnline.com (aka The Real Story with Michael Lohan).

On the surface, the site is Michael's latest forum in his war against his ex-wife Dina, and Lindsay's girlfriend Samantha Ronson-- though this morning, in its second day of operation, he stated that his intentions are far more benevolent:

"...Let me say that this website is NOT about Lindsay or Samantha. I have no intention of disclosing any information or feelings I may have about either one of them unless it is in defense of what they or one of their 'mouthpieces' might say about me. If in fact, one of their 'sources', so called 'friends' or 'spokespersons' have something to say about me, then I guess we will just have to open up discussion on them as well.

"AGAIN, this website is a forum to shed light on things in a positive and truthful way.

"It is about bringing the world the truth about any situations or stories reported in the media that are worthy of discussing. It is about righting the wrongs and determining facts from fiction.

"This website is an open forum to discuss questionable topics and even introduce you to worthy events (which help others) that you might like to participate in.

"For example; during the Sundance Film Festival, my partners and I will be hosting a series of events which aid numerous charities and initiatives, such as human trafficking, child slavery, ministries, The Crohn's Foundation, various cancer foundations, hunger and other worthy causes..."

Michael's inaugural blog posting yesterday did indeed focus on his dispute with LiLo and SaMAN:

"Today... my darling daughter Lindsay was asked for a comment in response to me saying, 'Samantha is on drugs!'

"Lindsay’s only response was, 'look at him!'

"WOW! Linds, how forthright! Let me ask you; was it me who was actually pictured in the train station with a bag full of prescription drugs? Do you see me out partying with Lindsay, my other children or having raging wars with her? Was it me who jumped out of a DJ booth and punched Lindsay when she was with Calum Best? Did I drive Lindsay around for hours in LA until she fell asleep and before I ran low on gas only to call the paps and sell pictures to them? Uh uh!

"As a matter of fact, I was the one who tried to keep those kinds of parasites away from Lindsay...

"Sure, I made mistakes, but I righted the wrongs..."


Only problem? Though well-known as "Michael Lohan," the site's URL identifies him as "Mike Lohan," which may cause an extra burden on the gossip writers looking to fill space. Despite his protestations about the media machine working against him, ex-con preacher Michael has spectacularly managed to keep himself in the headlines on practically a daily basis since he stepped out of prison two years ago. MikeLohanOnline.com promises to add to the surprises. We've already added it to our links list.

Stay tuned!

So who's spreading lies about Michael Lohan?

Even the greatest gossip column in the world can get it wrong once in awhile. That’s what makes it gossip. And today’s item on Michael Lohan in the New York Post’s legendary Page Six is wrong wrong wrong…

So says Lohan friend and reality television producer Brett Hudson in Malibu, whose screams of outrage could be heard all the way to Sixth Avenue after he read this morning’s lead item, "Lohan's New Warning to Dad." The item, which spread like wildfire through the Internet, stated in part:

LINDSAY Lohan finally talked to her estranged, felonious father, Michael Lohan, and told him, "You still haven't changed. Don't go near my mother ever again," a source told Page Six. "It wasn't the phone call Michael wanted."

…Michael had hoped to patch things up with his daughter. But after talking to her dad, "Lindsay called her mother [Dina] and told her to be careful and to take care of her brother and sister," said our source…

“That is an absolute fabrication,” Hudson tells us. “And if it comes from a source, that source should be taken into an alley and forced to listen to Sanjaya until he or she learns how to tell the truth.

“Yes, there has been a conversation between Michael and his daughter, Lindsay. But the content and tenor of that conversation are drastically different from that which was reported in Page Six. Whoever fed them that information is a liar. A damnable liar. A fucking liar.”

Michael Lohan was released from prison earlier this month, after serving nearly two years on drunk driving and probation violation charges. While in prison, Lohan took Bible study courses and is now working with the Teen Challenge ministry on Long Island. And Hudson and his team at Frozen Pictures are shooting a reality television series about his life and work.

“It seems that every time Michael has any contact with his daughter, someone is very threatened, and the publicity machine starts to churn out the propaganda,” says Hudson, who's finding a new career correcting inaccurate Lohan reports. “I’ve known Michael for three years. Before he went away, he said the truth would come out about who was lying about him. Well, these people are making it pretty obvious where and from whom the stories are coming from. Why would someone be threatened by a father's love for his daughter or a daughter's need for her dad? Who would be threatened? You do the math.”

So what was the conversation between Michael and Lindsay?

“You want to know the truth? You want to know what Lindsay said to her dad?” Hudson said. “Wait for the reality show.”

Michael Lohan reality trailer an Internet smash!

VIEWERS TELL PEREZ HILTON, YOUTUBE:
"PURE PIECE OF TELEVISION GENIUS!"
"I WOULD WATCH IT!"
"I COULDN'T TURN IT OFF!"
"I PRAY SOMEONE PICKS THAT SHOW UP!"

The votes are pouring in and the message is loud and clear: Who needs Dog The Bounty Hunter when Michael Lohan's in the wings?

Hours after we revealed the much-buzzed about pitch tape for for The Michael Lohan Reality Project-- or I Love Lindsay-- from our pals at Frozen Pictures, thousands upon thousands of people have viewed it here and on YouTube and are howling in laughter, outrage and demands to see more! We told you that a lot of television network execs thought the show was too edgy, that the "r" word (as in "religion") off limits-- but that was before The Dog showed his true colours and we members of the WGA walked out and left the nets about to be high and dry.

And that was before Internet bad boy Perez Hilton posted the clip and bestowed it with the ultimte pop culture imprimatur:

Click here to watch the pitch tape that Michael Lohan has been showing networks in his attempts to get a reality show.

It’s just as wonderfully bad as you would expect! So bad actually that no one is said to be interested in acquiring the show.

The majority of the show is about Michael trying to spread the word of Jesus. At one point he even dresses up as a homeless man and attempts to get money from strangers.

P.S. The cameo from Hookers for Jesus is what takes it to a whole other level!

More important, Perez's readers smack it right back at him-- they think it's great!

Rammy says
W…T…F

Hahaha!!!!! says
Cool, I really hope he get’s his own show. Dina got her own show so why can’t he I ask?

sarah-nade says
I say good luck to him. If it keeps him out of the alcohol and stuff then good for him. If it works for him, it works. Don’t be hating!

Kendra says
He should bring it to the 700 Club producers and ask for a weekly 5 minute reality slot. At the very least, it could increase 700 Club ratings to 5 viewers instead of their typical 4 viewers.


toby says
fuck u perez. the guys doing a good thing. hes the most positive thing in lindsays life…. notice how shes better now hes in her life… fuck u for puting everyone who does any good down

Jennifer says
I couldn’t turn it off! Thought I’d just watch a few seconds of it. I think it would be interesting to watch, though I think Michael should be more focused on putting his life together than being on TV.

Lisa says
That was touching. I am glad he is heading towards the right path. That makes me happy.

Kelly S says
WOW
I CANT BELIEVE IM SAYING THIS BUT THIS COULD BE KINDA GOOD.
no on the homeless guy skit, but if edited properly……BRING IT ON

Raechel says – reply to this
hahah the part at the end where he stands there with the camera circling him with his arms toward the sky is DEF the best part of the whole thing. oh… that and “can you tell lindsay i love her?” haha GLAMS

Diana says
omg!!! lol at the ending!!!! ugh i feel like i need to take a shower..

emily says
oh my god. is he serious?
“no, don’t sit on the bed”
best part of the whole thing

Kat says
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no wonder linsay went nutz-o…jesus freak
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

silverdoe says
I hope someone sees this for the pure piece of television genius it is and gives it some air time! I was practically glued to my seat! The bit at the end where he is standing with his arms outstretched is magnificent haha.

Adelle says
Michael Lohan needs to go home and think about how fucking crazy he is!!

Shireen says
wow.
my personal favorite (aside from the obvious hookers for jesus) is Micheal Lohan floating in the clouds..
wow.

Dave says
This guy seems genuine… Git a grip Perez. Let it be…

chica says
i hope fox or e! picks up this show…if they do their job and make it just a tad more tasteless, it can be a hit!
“david, i don’t want your money. my name’s michael lohan…i’m lindsay lohan’s father.”

diegodawg says
is this for real?? it seemed like satire. the outstretched arms a la Scott Stapp was classic. “will he save his daughter?” ha, so cheesy!!!

Babe says
he does a lot of name dropping….”I’m Michael Lohan Lindsay Lohan’s Father.”

Shireen says
OMG OMG the TITLE!!! I missed it the first time.
The Micheal Lohan Reality Project
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Kimberly says
Umm…it’s not that bad, Perezito. As a matter of fact, more power to him because he is actually getting his life together and HELPING OTHERS which is a foreign concept to some people. I don’t know about a reality show but he appears to be doing some positive things.

mary says
These people give Long Islanders a bad name

irrational female says
Poor lindsay. Could you imagine if these were your parents?

MM says
Hilarious crap! Love it when the reformed hooker freaks out when Michael tries to sit on the bed–like it might push her into a relapse!

chris says
I watched the whole thing and i agree with everyone…..i couldnt stop watching it because its sooooooooo bad, the clouds, the hookers 4 jesus him mentioning linsay, taking about her mug shot, spinning in the rain, the hooker saying dont sit on the bed…all priceless
Both parents are fucked up…wonder she turned out the way she is

CHRIS says
loves this shiz!!!

j says
Why does that hooker look like Dina
haaaaaaahhaha aaaaaaaaaaa

dani says
This is just too bad to be ignored. If he is seriously shopping this around, someone is going to pick it up. If they give Salt & Pepa their own show, they’ll give this loony a show too. My bet is that E!, Bravo, or VH1 will snap this up.

Meg says
OMG- he’s so full of shit. Does any body actually buy this “I found Jesus” crap? He has a troubled daughter and all that he can think about is himself and his fame. THis is why she’s so messed up! Apart from that: BORING!

The ORIGINAL Brainiac says
***HYSTERICAL! I have a masters in counseling and worked as a counselor for several years before staying home to raise my youngest child. What a con man STILL! Both parents are fame whoring losers. Please take your dog and pony show family and get off the gossip radar. You also have con people clinging to you like dingleberries. Oh, praise Jesus, you are changed. Yeah, right! ********

tana says
The audacity of this guy is UNBELIEVEABLE!!!!

suzy says
of course no network wants to pick up the show…hollywood hates christians

emily says
hahahaha i hope this is a show

Sill says
what a trainwreck! loves it.

WoWzers says
Good for him for trying to do something positive with his life

Meghan says
I pray someone picks that show up!

Cyrano says
Fucking Father of the Year…bravo Michael- bravo…

THIS MADE MY NIGHT!!! says
F***ing priceless. What a media whore! My favorite part was when he superimposed himself over the clouds like he’s god or something. And that hooker looked alot like Dina. I bet he had the hots for her.

AbsolutDirtbag says
I would watch it. I have no idea why, but I would.

Phil says
Him and Dina need to combine their shows. Now that would be a ratings winner.

jbintokyo says
I like Michael Lohan. Based on this video, I would watch his reality show.

Andrea says
That is HILARIOUS! OMG, Michael Lohan and Kirk Cameron should get a show together. Two people that no one gives a shit about using their “Celebrity status” to “save” people and be a Christian…
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

anna says
oh shit, that made my fucking week!!! the clouds?? the beams of light?? the hookers for jesus??!! OMG that is so fucking funny!!! and is that led zepplin’s kashmir playing in the background??? who? what? why? hahahahaha BEST VIDEO I’VE EVER SEEN OIN THE INTERNET.

furrymuff says
wow! that was powerful shit!

RDiva says
Can he save his daughter..(oh please!!!!) Love how they use the movie phone voice. Hahhaa No theatrics please. Who will save me from having to see another jerk cashing in on his kids name.

Stay tuned here for more from the Michael Lohan Reality Project...

EXCLUSIVE! Dad insists: "Lindsay Lohan was NOT blackmailed into appearing on TMZ TV show"

When we'd heard that Lindsay Lohan made an appearance on the inconsequential whitewashed syndicated television version of the corporate porn-pushing gossip site TMZ.com the other night, we hadn't realized that she'd not only given the appearance of cooperation, but that she'd actually gone into the belly of the beast, sat in on one of Harvey Levin's phony Mr. Chips boypen production meetings and videotaped a bit as if she'd been invited back to Saturday Night Live.

Realizing that she'd endured the equivalent of having tea in the sitting room of her rapist, we immediately assumed that she'd probably been blackmailed by the TMZ street urchin scumbags; that there actually must be some kind of Lindsay Lohan sex tape out there and that the shaved bronzed midget Mr. Levin had done an Old School tabloid trick of offering to trade that sordid potential story for a benediction from the star (as troubled and down as she may be).

So we went to the source-- Lindsay's daddy-- and asked him straight out:

"Is Harvey Levin blackmailing Lindsay or Dina?"

Rev. Michael Lohan insists that it wasn't blackmail after all.

He tells us in an email:

"She DID on her own free will as a joke!! She actually made fun of the paps by doing it showing how they make big issues of little things like shopping for Cheerios."

Let's hope that in this case, father knows best. Because Lindsay certainly didn't...

Meanwhile, our stories on TMZ's Elliott Yamin disgrace apparently struck a nerve and have led to a lot of chatter among insurgents within the Twink Male Zone. And they've been chattering to us.

So stay tuned.

Michael Lohan speaks about ex-wife's reality show

"If that's what Dina wants to do, great. I hope it works out for her, and I hope it works out for our kids. And if she does do the show, I hope this time she surrounds herself and our children with the right people.

"But at this time, the priority for both of us should be concentrating on our daughter, Lindsay."

Lindsay Lohan's father Michael, who's seen public opinion turn in his favor in recent weeks, has temperate words for the surprising-- and some are saying shocking-- news that the E! Entertainment network is in talks with his ex-wife Dina to star in a reality show by the name of Mom-ager.

The title is a play on the word "manager"-- not "overgrown teenager," which would also fit--and the series will show her trying to turn her youngest children, Ali, 14, and Cody, 11, into stars." Just like Lindsay.

Just like Lindsay?

The exploitative and comedic potential of the pitch are obvious, since Dina long ago let her role as Lindsay's mother, protector and manager play second fiddle to her status as hanger-on and BFF as she's lived vicariously through her daughter while riding shotgun on her booze- and drug-fueled rocket from the top of show business to rehab. And in recent months, the 44-year-old former dancer has been eager to shift the spotlight over to herself, beyond the fingerbang gossip items and desperation photo spreads. Even after the obvious and cynical ridicule by the producers of Entertainment Tonight when they hired her as "reporter" for exclusives about Lindsay's first rehab stay and ludicrously on the red carpet for her troubled film, Georgia Rule, she's anxious to give it another go in her dream to become "The White Oprah."

Michael Lohan, of course, is the subject of his own reality television series-- one that E!, with its connections to Lindsay's publicists and studio contacts, understandably passed on. On the surface, with his troubled past, tempestuous relations with Lindsay and her "people," and recent stay in prison, Michael Lohan seems better better suited to HBO or VH-1's Celebreality block.

But Michael's life and show are turning out to be something altogether different. His "rebirth" as a Christian in prison and his work as a licensed minister and rehab counsellor at a halfway house in Long Island has produced real results, and his concern for Lindsay and her well-being has been apparent. His reality show, which documents his work, far from Hollywood yet a stone's throw away-- is shaping up into something that goes far beyond the Anna Nicole-Tom Sizemore variety.

And with word that Lindsay was let out of rehab Friday night-- to attend St. Aidan's Episcopal Church--dad's looking better by the day.

Meanwhile, lets hope E! keeps an eye out for the kids' welfare in all this. Remember what happened to Anna Nicole's...

EXCLUSIVE!!!! MICHAEL LOHAN GOES BALLISTIC OVER EX-WIFE'S REALITY SHOW! CLAIMS THEFT OF IDEAS, CONCEPT & TITLE!

Lindsay Lohan’s father Michael has given his blessing in the past to his ex-wife’s rival “reality” series, but now that Dina’s show has been picked officially by E!, he's fighting mad, and charging larceny of the concept... and title!

Michael emails us about “this ‘Living Lohan’ thing”:

“Dina took our entire concept and used it....Including the name. Ours was ‘Living with the Lohans’....hers is "Living Lohan". How creative!!!!

"I spoke to Dominic (Barbara), Ben (Petrofsky), Barry Gross and John Di Mascio, all attornies, and every one confirms that I pitched the exact same show to Dina back in 2004. It was even in the press when Dina and her bodyguard (Ty Dux) leaked it out and even said, what a stupid idea it was. IT IS OUR INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY! I believe that you even said that you pitched it to Bunim and Murray. You should do a whole piece on this…"

Our pals at Frozen Pictures are the ones behind The Michael Lohan Reality Project, the brilliant but so-far too-controversial-for-television reality series staring Daddy L and the colorful characters—from Rev. Jimmy Jack to Lindsay—in his new life. The concept—Lohan out of prison, out to reunite his family, save his famous daughter and, as a minister with an evangelical outreach program, save others—all the while dancing on the razor edge of parole and coming up with his own television show ideas—was captured in a wild sales tape that became an Internet hit after Perez Hilton went with it (see it on the right hand side of this site).

The hipsters at Defamer called it:

“the mind-fuck Michael Lohan reality show… watching Mikey sending former Baywatch babes into the arms of perverts, traipsing around cities in a Tyra-like attempt to see what it feels like to be homeless, and beginning the video pitch while standing in front of a glamour shots cloud background…”

Alex Blagg of VH1’s Best Week Ever wrote:

“Look at this clip reel, and for the love of God, give Michael Lohan the reality show he so desperately wants. Who needs Jim & Pam & The Office?... The most talented comedy genius on the planet couldn’t come up with this stuff.”

Michael did indeed pitch to Dina a show called "Living with The Lohans" as an alternative to his big-money divorce demands before he went off to prison three years ago. And the big, powerful Hollywood publicists linked to Dina and once-golden goose Lindsay did much to keep Michael's reality project off the air. But why a network honcho wouldn’t take his show and pair it with Dina’s, creating

The Living La Vida Lohan Loco Hour

is beyond us. Those Lohans are a hell of a lot more interesting than the Kardashians. Or Paris Hilton. Or those housewives in Orange County. Or Manhattan. Or those little people.

X17 makes its mark with Lohan scoops

Congratulations to X17, the celebrity news site that scooped the world on the Lindsay Lohan car crash this weekend while the boys at TMZ were asleep or hiding out in Matthew McConaughey's bushes.

The photo agency that's quickly become the dominant force in Hollywood celebrity journalism broke through the Memorial Day Weekend malaise with word Saturday that the young actress cheated death-- and cheated arrest when she crashed her Mercedes on Sunset Boulevard yards away from Frank Sinatra's old house.

After the photos were broadcast and wired around the world, the site followed up with an exclusive statement from Lohan's father Michael, who's out of prison, licensed as a minister, working with drug addicted youth, desperate to get his family together again-- and the subject of a reality television series produced by our pals at Frozen Pictures:

Lindsay needs to find God, get better, clean house and start all over again with the people who were there for her at the beginning: her family. Too many people are around Lindsay for the wrong reasons. They want to see what they can get from her instead of caring about Lindsay herself. I’m her father. I don’t want anything from her but her love and to be her father first. I’m here for Lindsay as a father and a father only.

And it’s about time that her mother Dina stop building up the walls of division between myself and my children—especially Lindsay. And if Dina really cares about out children--especially Lindsay-- then she should do the right thing so we can both be there as parents. Because what Lindsay needs are both parents. I wish Dina would put things aside and act the way God wants us to: right the wrongs and not
compound the wrongs.

I hope Lindsay finally gets the help that she needs. I want her to know that her Daddy is here for her.

X17 and its website have established themselves as the smart, comprehensive alternative to TMZ, the corporate, porn-pushing and checkbook justice-skirting AOL/Time Warner website that sends kids with video cameras to annoy celebrities outside nightclubs and features distateful headlines like this recent batch:

WHOSE HOLE?
Lilo-- Pole Patrol
Trunks or Speedos?
Katie Holmes' Tasty Treats
Kevin Spacey is a Baller!
Rodriguez Cans in Cannes
"Idol" TiVo Fans Got Screwed
Clooney Turns Tricks in Cannes
Real Ari Really Was an A**Hole
Jacko Gets Male Escort in London
Rosie's Rearview -- Creating a Stink
John Travolta & Kelly Preston Finally Get Lei'd Together!
Lindsay -- Move Bitch, Get Out the Way!
Fan to Jessica: "Once You Go Black ..."
Mouth-to-Mouth McConaughation?
Play "Lost" -- Get Jack Off (The Island)
Duchovny Mooseknuckles Around Venice Beach
Matt: Come on Baby, Light My Fire!
Melinda Doolittle -- Before She Got Screwed

TMZ has been playing catch-up the last 24 hours, but the damage is done. After getting much hype for buying the Mel Gibson arrest report and other scoops handed to the site from Time/Warner's more legitimate operations, TMZ is headed to television. But unless the show is hosted by a shirtless Harvey Levin, the TV show won't come close to reflecting the mucky reality of the website, and with reports that the operation is getting off on the wrong foot with staffing with "straight" news people and syndicated television producers instead of smart, experienced tabloid veterans, TMZ TV seems destined to last as long as the National Enquirer TV show-- which is not long.

While X17 got the Lindsay scoop, TMZ's editor was having this dream:

Now Michael Lohan wants to sue Ashton Kutcher

Lindsay Lohan's father Michael has more than one new television "reality" show to be mad about. While he’s screaming about his ex-wife Dina stealing his ideas and title for her new Living Lohan series on E!, we hear he’s also ready to climb into the legal ring against television production heavyweight (and Demi Moore husband) Ashton Kutcher.

Kutcher’s latest show, Pop Fiction, premiered on E! last week, and appears to be a twist on his series Punk’d-- instead of “punking” celebrities, the celebs are punking the people.

But as viewers of this site would know, Pop Fiction is very similar to Deeds, Lohan’s show pilot that was featured in The Michael Lohan Reality Project salestape that was a huge hit on YouTube (the one in which he dressed up as a homeless person).

As seen in the clip above, Lohan stands before a "Punk’d" logo and says:

“Deeds is a lot like the show, Punk’d.
It’s about celebrities going into the streets, in disguise.
And getting people to do good deeds.”

We reported on Friday reported that Michael Lohan is up in arms over his ex-wife Dina’s alleged appropriation of his reality show concept and title with the new “Living Lohan” show on the E! network. And Michael has a point, since his original concept, “Living with The Lohans,” was pitched and publicized a few years ago-- with the twist of Michael and Dina giving it another shot for the sake of the kids.

And remember that the Bible-thumping parolee’s own reality show was nixed largely because of Dina’s ties to the Hollywood machine -– not to mention, insiders say, because of the Christian angle (the networks do not want to tread on sacred turf).

In any case, the rejection was short-sighted in light of Michael’s activities in the months since he made the rounds of pitch meetings (and then, in a boneheaded moment of panic, denied the show even existed!)-- reconciling with Lindsay, reuniting his family, and getting in the papers on a weekly basis.

What about the producers of The Michael Lohan Reality Project? We spoke this morning to Brett Hudson one of our pals at Frozen Pictures.

“We have no argument or issues with E! or Ashton or Dina," Brett said. "I understand Michael’s frustration, but there are lots of reasons our series hasn’t been picked up yet. And his legal status (note: Lohan is on parole) is top of the list. And if you want to know the truth, I've got bigger issues with Michael. This show isn't going anywhere until he pays back the money he owes us."

Whoa. Sounds like an update is in the offing. Stay tuned.

Lohan Dad released; Lohan daughter questioned

As we'd tipped you off in a world exclusive, Lindsay Lohan's father Michael Lohan was released from prison this morning and headed home to a new chance at a fresh start at making things right in his life.

Is that news?

Well, mainstream news outlets as far-ranging as the CHINA DAILY reported it today, quoting producer Brett Hudson, who's been filming a Lohan reality project for the past two and a half years, saying, "Michael Lohan is a changed man."

We hate to use the word "ironic," but "ironic," isn't it, that hours before he was released, Lindsay, who's been in and out of rehab, was leaving a New York City nightclub called Club Butter, when for some reason, she drove her own car away, with a bottle of clear liquid in one hand-- with paparazzi and (TMZ-style amateur) stalkerazzi in pursuit. After a Diana-like chase, Lindsay allegedly struck a shutterbug with her car. Only after police intervened did Lindsay get into her bodyguard's SUV.

The TV show Access Hollywood bought the paparazzi video for money and got the "scoop"around the world. Dangerous stuff, folks.

We, for one, can't wait for the Michael Lohan reality show.

Go through the archives. See whose prophecies have rung true...

EXCLUSIVE! PRODUCERS SUE X17 PAPARAZZI AGENCY OVER LOHAN PHOTOS; LAWSUIT CHARGES BREACH OF CONTRACT & FRAUD

"They forced us to sue!
We want this lawsuit to shine a light
on the slimy practices of the new stalkerazzi..."

A pair of noted Hollywood film and documentary producers filed a potential million- dollar lawsuit this morning against the paparazzi photo agency X17, claiming breach of contract and fraud relating to photos of the reunion of Lindsay Lohan and her father Michael.

According to papers filed in Los Angeles Superior Court in Santa Monica, Burt Kearns and Brett Hudson of Frozen Pictures claim they’d “entered into a contract with Brandy Navarre & X17, Inc. on August 29, 2007, to ‘set up and shoot’ ‘exclusive pix’ (photos) of the reunion of Lindsay Lohan and her father Michael (the subject of a Frozen Pictures documentary project) in Provo, Utah” in early September, but that “on October 5, 2007, Navarre refused to pay, claiming she had made a side deal… paying an unamed third party a flat fee… and ‘assumed’ Plaintiff would share in the funds.”

The suit asks for $66,500 in unpaid fees, $200,000 in damages and a percentage of photo of video sales that could add hundreds of thousands of dollars to the total, It states that Navarre claims her photographer in Provo had organized a “flat rate” with Michael Lohan, but “wired (the money) to a bank account in someone else’s name... (I don’t know it off the top of my head). I assumed Michael would split this with you.”

According to the suit, Lohan denies making any deals with X17. Both he and his daughter Lindsay are expected to be subpoenaed to testify.

“This is a simple lawsuit. We had an written agreement to perform a service for X17. They approached us! We did our part, but X17 thought they’d get off more cheaply by double-dealing,” Kearns told Tabloidbaby.com exclusively this afternoon.

“We asked X17 nicely to pay what they owe. They forced us to sue them.”

Kearns says the photo deal was made, in part, to publicize and fund The Michael Lohan Reality Project, the continuing documentary reality seriesFrozen Pictures has been shooting since 2004 (The series’ promotional trailer was leaked to YouTube this week, generating more than 100,000 viewers in less than two days). Photos from the project have appeared numerous times on the X17 website and been sold around the world.

“We’ve been working with X17 since the spring,” says Kearns. “We thought they were the new breed. Unfortunately it’s a new breed that hands cameras to valet parking attendants and street people, that endangers lives by chasing unstable young women in cars—and doesn’t live up to its word.

“I’ve worked in the tabloid news business for close to thirty years,” Kearns, former managing editor of Hard Copy and producer of A Current Affair (and author of Tabloid Baby! -- ed.), adds. “I’ve dealt with the great paparazzi, from Zanger to Ramey to Woody. We don’t work this way. TMZ, X17-- they’re all the same. They’re slash-and-burn amateurs. We want this lawsuit to shine a light on the slimy practices of the new stalkerazzi—and to bring all their dealings and bookkeeping to light.”

(Kearns and Hudson ((formerly of The Hudson Brothers and uncle of Kate Hudson)) may be best known for writing and producing the Burt Reynolds sports comedy feature, Cloud 9, along with Academy Award winner Albert S. Ruddy; they're currently producing the musical biopic The Seventh Python. X17 made headlines for suing Internet gossip Perez Hilton.)

Lindsay Lohan watch: Sin bath suggested

With Lindsay Lohan supposedly in India lending her authority to a BBC documentary on the trafficking of women and children, she twitters that she's saved "over forty children... within one days work," and a Hindu statesman says the talented and troubled young actress has a chance to save herself.


Rajan Zed suggests that Michael Lohan's daughter take a dip in the Ganges River so she can "rediscover herself."

He's quoted: "Lindsay Lohan should rediscover herself by taking a dip in the holy Ganges. It is believed that bathing in the sacred Ganges purifies one of all sin and its waters confer immortality."

Lindsay Lohan watch: Sex tape & sex toy

There are reports that a sex tape featuring hard-living, hardly-working, troubled and talented actress Lindsay Lohan is being circulated among certain circles and is about to be released on the Internet through an "offshore porn site." The video is supposedly 47 seconds long and shows Lindsay frollicking naked and performing a sex act with an unidentified male. Aware of the embarrassing news that could pose another roadblock in any attempt to regain her potential as a respected star, Lindsay responded by appearing last night at a West Holywood nightclub called Voyeur at a party for something called Vida, which is described as a "luxury sex toy." She was dressed for the occasion.

Who will save Lindsay Lohan?

Lohan's Dad from Hell finds God, wants TV show

It was two years ago that our friends at Frozen Pictures were running around the Sunset Strip with video cameras, following Lindsay Lohan's father Michael for a TV series pilot based on his notoriety as Hollywood's Dad from Hell.

Papa Lohan envisioned the series as a tabloid-bashing talk show called "The Lowdown," and he'd lined up his friend Bo Dietl and others to help him root out the sources of phony tabloid stories. But the Frozen producers saw Michael as the greatest show of all, and convinced him to be the center of a reality series called "Hollywood Dad," built around Lohan's futile efforts to contact his daughter-- with a Rupert Pupkin talk show in the middle.

The following day, production moved from the Strip to a building on Ventura Boulevard and a talk show set with lights and cameras, where Lohan would show off his Lowdown interviewing skills. He'd promised to bring along his pal Tom Sizemore to discuss how the media lied about his alleged drug use and other misdeeds. The crew waited. And waited. Sizemore wasn't going to make it. He'd been arrested at his home-- for drugs. Lohan, meanwhile, went missing.

He turned up a few days later on his home turf, Long Island, under arrest for violating a restraining order taken out by his family. Within weeks, a mysterious, fiery drunk-driving crash landed him in prison for a laundry list of convictions, including assault on a sanitation worker and beating his brother-in-law with a shoe.

Michael Lohan has been behind bars ever since. The Frozen guys got him an interview with Rafael Abramovitz during last year's ill-fated relaunch of A Current Affair. Bad enough his lawyer wouldn't let him discuss his family or daughter, but all he asked is that he not be referred to as "the Dad from Hell," and the producers in New York labelled him that exactly.

This week, Lohan called to tell us he's once again been denied parole. He says that if he's rejected at his next hearing in three months, he'll be in the big house in upstate New York until at least October 2007. But the Dad from Hell says he's got a Heavenly edge this time around: he's not only found God, but he's become an ordained minister.

Lohan didn't say whether he'd done it online or sent in a self-addressed stamped envelope, but before the prison cut off his phone call, he did quote Scripture and say he now wants to star in a TV series that teaches kids the evils of drugs.

Hey, Tom Sizemore has a reality show, and he did lots worse things than Michael. Right? The Frozen guys say the cameras are still waiting.

Fun fact: Michael Lohan's full name is Michael Douglas Lohan.