Lohan's Dad from Hell finds God, wants TV show

It was two years ago that our friends at Frozen Pictures were running around the Sunset Strip with video cameras, following Lindsay Lohan's father Michael for a TV series pilot based on his notoriety as Hollywood's Dad from Hell.

Papa Lohan envisioned the series as a tabloid-bashing talk show called "The Lowdown," and he'd lined up his friend Bo Dietl and others to help him root out the sources of phony tabloid stories. But the Frozen producers saw Michael as the greatest show of all, and convinced him to be the center of a reality series called "Hollywood Dad," built around Lohan's futile efforts to contact his daughter-- with a Rupert Pupkin talk show in the middle.

The following day, production moved from the Strip to a building on Ventura Boulevard and a talk show set with lights and cameras, where Lohan would show off his Lowdown interviewing skills. He'd promised to bring along his pal Tom Sizemore to discuss how the media lied about his alleged drug use and other misdeeds. The crew waited. And waited. Sizemore wasn't going to make it. He'd been arrested at his home-- for drugs. Lohan, meanwhile, went missing.

He turned up a few days later on his home turf, Long Island, under arrest for violating a restraining order taken out by his family. Within weeks, a mysterious, fiery drunk-driving crash landed him in prison for a laundry list of convictions, including assault on a sanitation worker and beating his brother-in-law with a shoe.

Michael Lohan has been behind bars ever since. The Frozen guys got him an interview with Rafael Abramovitz during last year's ill-fated relaunch of A Current Affair. Bad enough his lawyer wouldn't let him discuss his family or daughter, but all he asked is that he not be referred to as "the Dad from Hell," and the producers in New York labelled him that exactly.

This week, Lohan called to tell us he's once again been denied parole. He says that if he's rejected at his next hearing in three months, he'll be in the big house in upstate New York until at least October 2007. But the Dad from Hell says he's got a Heavenly edge this time around: he's not only found God, but he's become an ordained minister.

Lohan didn't say whether he'd done it online or sent in a self-addressed stamped envelope, but before the prison cut off his phone call, he did quote Scripture and say he now wants to star in a TV series that teaches kids the evils of drugs.

Hey, Tom Sizemore has a reality show, and he did lots worse things than Michael. Right? The Frozen guys say the cameras are still waiting.

Fun fact: Michael Lohan's full name is Michael Douglas Lohan.