1999-2010

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Isn't Artie Lange dead already?

"I am a guy who has struggled with every kind of addiction. I love gambling, and it has gotten me into trouble before. I love drugs and booze. The drugs finally had to go, but the booze is still very much in play. And you know I love broads.

"I am definitely not someone who is embarrassed to get a hooker or two.”


That quote is from Artie Lange in a sad story in today’s LA Times Calendar section; sad because it basically takes for granted that the schlubadub comic will eventually go the Chris Farley route, sad because it picks up with his once-public struggles where he left us hanging six months ago, and sad because the 12-step blasting, politically-incorrect and embarrassing honesty was a part of our weekday mornings before he and the rest of the Howard Stern radio team were swept into the Sirius Satellite Protection Program to play out radio’s most straight-talking radio show to a miniscule paying audience.

While chubby Katie Couric jets around the country on a phony baloney meet-and-greet, selected audience tour, blowing out chunks about using the CBS Evening News to help solve world problems (the aged audience would prefer a focus on incontinence problems), there’s Stern’s radio sidekick Artie, pressing the flesh in Vegas, picking up more standup gigs, TV appearances and lowbrow movie roles, living it up, blowing tens of thousands of dollars in casinos, hiring call girls, boozing away memories of his dad the paralyzed roofer, and blathering about hookers while counting down the hours until he winds up on the floor of a high roller’s suite with his pants around his ankles and swollen tongue jutting from his vomit-flecked lips.

And most of his audience is missing Artie’s wild ride to Hell because we don’t pay for radio.

“I love gambling! I love drugs and booze! The drugs finally had to go, but the booze is still very much in play! I love broads! I am definitely not someone who is embarrassed to get a hooker or two!"

Jeez! Knucklehead honesty like that is a jolt off the newspaper page today. Think about it. Only six months ago, it was an everyday morning occurrence.

Sad. When we left off, Artie was holding it together with the first real girlfriend he’s ever had. The article lets us know it didn’t work out:

"You know, I have never been that much in love with a woman before in my life. It is the most adult like I have ever felt in a relationship. We dated for 4 1/2 years. But it has been dying a slow, painful death. I think it might be officially over. It is very hard."

Sad.

24 comments:

Sun Follower said...

It's not *that* sad - I got Sirius Satellite Radio in time to hear the first Howard Stern show - which has never been funnier now that Howard and cast are unbridled and totally FREE to say whatever they want. This is especially ture for Artie - he has been nothing short of hysterical since he can now express himself fully. Sirius has nearly 5 million subscribers (and climbing) most (like me) of which rode the Howard wave over - but to be honest - HOward is only a part of the package - commerical-free music in all genres, sports aplenty and lots of talk and comedy shows - it is WELL WORTH the $12/mo for me. I encourage ALL fans of music and free speech to subscribe.

Anonymous said...

Yea, what's wrong with you; Sirius is the best thing thats happened to Howard. Get a job, get Sirius and stop whining, beeach!

London escorts said...

Escort services are highly in demand nowadays all over the world. You won't find any big city without escort agency. It's highly convenient to use such services.

Girls Company said...

www.girlscompany.co.uk

London Escort Agency

As a respected and established London escort agency we provide companionship for all possible situations. From evening dates, travel or business companions to outright mind-blowing intimacy. We take pride in the service we provide and see to it that we match every customer with the best escort girl regarding his or hers requirement. Our escort agency works with only the best escort girls London houses. Our standards are above and beyond any other escort agency and customer satisfaction is the highest in the business.

Escort services

Our customers expect the best escort service and they have never been disappointed. Known for providing the best escort service in London our escort agency has a wide variety of escort girls to choose from. You name it we got it and .. you can get it ..

escorts in Kiev said...

Nice blog as for me.
It would be great to read more about this matter.
Thanks for posting that information.
With best regards Margo!!
escorts in Kiev

Brussels escorts said...

European escorts Sky models is the best place to find escorts in Brussels - Brussels escorts.

Elite London escorts said...

Bentley's International Models is a London escort agency providing elite top class.

Latin Escorts said...

Every person choose the road and the vehicle to travel by himself when he is grown up. And this choice influences him to the rest of his life.

London escort agency said...

Your Mademoiselle escorts agency is select the most charming, friendly and the finest London escorts for our Escort gallery and provide the best escort services in London.

Elite escorts said...

Beautiful escorts can be found at Elite Club International. Elite Club International is an elite escort agency operating mostly in Dubai and London.

Your Escort Agency said...

Your Escort Agency offers exclusive and most beautiful London escort girls of various nationalities.

Porn Star Escorts said...

Bunny Planet is an Exclusive Online Gentlemen's Club filled with Adult Stars, Adult Entertainers, Centerfolds and Erotic Models who want to meet you in person now!

ankara escort said...

Travesti,
Escort Bayan,
Travesti,
Escort Bayan,
Adana Escort Bayan,Ankara Escort Bayan,
Antalya Escort Bayan,istanbul anadolu yakası Escort Bayan,
istanbul avrupa yakası Escort Bayan,
Bursa Escort Bayan,
izmir Escort Bayan,
Kayseri Escort Bayan,

trabzon Escort Bayan,
İstanbul Travestileri,

London escorts said...

Adoras Models prides itself in running a honest and efficient London escort agency. All of the girls are real and pictures are 100% genuine.

London Elite Gallery said...

London Elite Gallery is a highly respected international escort agency providing the most beautiful elite london escorts.

Crazy Escorts said...

London Escorts | Crazy Escorts in London. Escort girls in London with authentic photos and a friendly, professional service guaranteed.

Japanese London Escorts said...

We are a Central London agency with many of girls exclusive to London Japanese Paradise.

London Asian Escorts said...

London Asian Escorts is an Asian and Oriental escort agency operating in Central London. The agency provides escort service for a true gentlemen.

Escorts of London said...

Escort of London agency a well-established and respected agency. We have a great selection of girls in London for your pleasure.

Only Pleasures Escorts said...

Only Pleasures is a well established and respected agency since 1999. We are pride of ourselves on having the most exquisite selection of girls in London for your pleasure…

Lijana said...

Transsexual dating website for transsexuals and gays with videos, forum, webcams and announcements.

Lijana said...

http://www.transsexuallondonescorts.co.uk
Hello gentleman, my name is Lisa and I am 26 year old, sexy and exotic, beautiful transsexual (PRE-OP)..

London Crumpet said...

London escorts directory London Crumpet is created to expose Independent escorts and escort agencies in London. Everybody can post their advert on this directory for FREE.

Unknown said...

Eta Saat Lüks Markaların Eta Saat Modelleri Güvenli Online Alışveriş Site Ata Saat'te! En Yeni Replika Saat Modelleri, Rolex Replika, Audemars Piguet Replika Saat.eta saat