Friday, May 19, 2006

McCartney Crack-Up: Heather tries to get a leg up

FICTION: "Heather has partied with and dated Arabs"
FACT: "Heather married Alfie Karmal in 1989, his father was Arabic, his mother was Greek, making him half Arabic. She has dated men of many nationalities, English, Italian, Arabic, Slovenian and so on, hardly a crime! They range from poverty stricken to exceptionally rich and back again. To make a big deal of this is only laughable. Is she only allowed to date caucasian men from the UK of average income ?!"

The Paul McCartney-Heather Mills separation and probable divorce is sad and hilariously entertaining-- and not for the obvious reasons. Unlike say, Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards, who trade vile accusations and lay out their briefs in the court of public opinion, this is a case of very powerful public people doing whatever they can to control the coverage, the spin and headlines (see Jared Paul Stern and Tabloid Baby), and freaking out when they fail.

McCartney is using his website to urge fans to “pay no attention to that man behind that curtain!” and ignore what they read in the papers.

Even funnier is a site that’s been floating out there for some time. The Heather Mills McCartney website is run by her sister Fiona. Most all of it is dedicated to correcting "misconceptions" about the nudie model divorcee who lost her leg in a traffic accident, sold her story to the tabloids from her hospital bed, then snagged the elderly, mourning, widowed McCartney and apparently nagged him to separation:

“I find it almost impossible to put into words for you all just how angry and hurt I am by the treatment Heather has received from so much of the media since she met and fell in love with Paul in 1999... Lots of people say to me, ‘Oh just ignore it Fiona, nobody believes it anyway.’… Certainly, it is easier to ignore the stupid little comments, such as ‘How much cellulite does she have?… But stop for just one minute and imagine how it would feel to have your family and loved ones sprawled across the front pages; put down by people they’ve never met 'She's a gold digger, a fantasist'; to read lies written by people who were paid to ‘spill the beans’ about a life you are part of and through which they may have passed just briefly; how it feels to know that your friends and family are being door-stepped and harassed by journalists simply because they know you…”

Sheesh. What are you journos doing in England? These people definitely feel harassed.

But the website’s a hoot. It hasn’t been updated to cover the separation, but does include a handy “Facts & Fiction” page that covers “some of the most common inaccuracies printed about Heather; the truth is written alongside each one.”

Remember, this gal’s got quite a history, so there are dozens, including:

FICTION: "Heather failed as a model and only did glamour modelling"
FACT: This is quite simply untrue. Heather did many modelling campaigns and catwalk work but reputable companies are not in the habit of selling photos to the press. This means that the only ones you get to see are photos from her brief stint as a glamour model when her ex-husband sent off a photo to a newspaper and got her involved as a teenager.

FICTION: "Heather is a publicity seeker"
FICTION: "Heather is a gold digger and married Paul for his money"
FICTION: "Heather lied that her Mother lost her leg at a young age also"
FICTION: "Heather is always clinging on to Paul"
FICTION: "Heather pushed Paul to reverse the song-writing credits on Lennon/McCartney songs to McCartney/Lennon”
FICTION: "Heather took over the Adopt A Minefield LA gala and made the audience uncomfortable"
FICTION: "Heather is heavily criticised for removing her prosthetic leg on CNN's Larry King Live"
FICTION: "Heather didn't enjoy herself at Stella's wedding and made Paul leave early"
FICTION: "Heather makes Paul go to the opening of an envelope"
FICTION: "Heather forces Paul to do 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire'"

Click here to read Heather’s sister’s side of the story.

And heck, click here to see those nudie “glamour shots.”

1 comment:

DodgerJon said...

She may not have two legs, but it's good to see that she's hung onto both nipples.