1999-2010

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Eat & switch: Ex-mayor turns Larry David's deli into an upscale, expensive, organic, goyish eatery

For years, Mort's Deli was the gathering place in the heart of Pacific Palisades, California, where Sunset Boulevard meets the Pacific Ocean. You might know it as the deli that's been featured often on HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm-- the place where Larry David had a sandwich named after him (the place was called "Leo's" on the show).

Mort died in 1999, and last year his widow closed a deal to sell the join to former Los Angeles mayor Richard Riordan, who owns several other eateries in Los Angeles including the crapulous tourist trap Gladstones at Sunset & PCH, and the aged Original Pantry downtown. All through the approval processes, Riordan promised to carry on Mort's tradition as a deli and comfortable, neighborly gathering place.

Did we forget Riordan is a politician? A look through the window this week revealed something that looked little like a delicatessan of any sort. And today, as the new Village Pantry prepares for a "soft opening" next week, it turns out that the deli is dead.

Mort's has gone "upscale." And brisket-less.

An article in the local Palisadian-Post today reveals that Riordan pulled the old switcheroo, and that his plans were very different all along:

The Village Pantry will be 'an upscale casual restaurant that offers deli foods like pastrami and corned beef sandwiches, ' (executive chef Douglas) Silberberg told the Palisadian-Post last Saturday. But it will also feature non-deli items such as the pulled pork sandwich ($12), where the meat is slow cooked in Guinness stout, smothered in barbeque sauce, joined by apple-wood smoked bacon, and served on a warm Kaiser roll...

The entire restaurant has been redone; the only vestiges from Mort's are the ice machine and the exhaust hood in the kitchen, though owner Riordan plans to have a wall dedicated to the former owners, Mort and Bobbie Farberow...

"A lot of people will associate this space with the old Mort's for a long time," Silberberg admitted. "We can't please everyone, but we will please an overwhelming majority. Those who are not initially pleased will come around."

...Meat for the restaurant will come from the Niman Ranch in northern California, where the animals are raised free of antibiotics. Eggs are from free-range chickens raised without hormones and antibiotics.

"Those eggs cost twice as much," Silberberg said, "but because of my background, I wouldn't settle for anything less than the best." Most of the restaurant's produce will come from farmers' markets, and will be organic...

"I'm cooking for myself and my family because we live here," the chef noted.

Looking at the menu posted on the front window at the Village Pantry, a few residents have questioned the prices, which begin at $10 for sandwiches and salads. Various scrambled egg dishes (with toast and potatoes) are $10, omelets $10.50 and French toast $9.

"It's very fair for the quality we're serving and the ingredients we're using,' Silberberg said. One example: the cheddar cheese used in omelets and sandwiches is aged two years and is white instead of yellow (not dyed). "We're serving upscale full-flavored breakfasts and lunches."

During the interview, a Palisades resident came in the back door and told Silberberg that he should have brisket and hot dogs on his Village Pantry menu. Silberberg politely explained that the restaurant isn't going to be a renovated deli, but a new entity, although it will carry Matzo ball soup. He also didn't discount the idea of adding hot dogs.

In addition to potential $15 hot dogs, Mort's banquet room, the Oak Room, is being turned into a "high-end California bistro" in which kids are discouraged because it will also include Palisades' second full-service bar. That's a point in Riordan's favour, though historically, the Palisades has not been kind to upscale eateries. We'll soon see if the former people's cherse underestimated the appeal of a budget-priced sandwich, eggs and brisket joint in the center of a posh suburb.

FUN LINK: Click here and dig the wild connection between Tabloid Baby's author and Richard Riordan, the pol who broke his promise to Mort's loyal customers.

Pussy masala & paranoia: Is Roger Ailes "exposé" the Tabloid Baby of the Fox News generation?

This site is an offshoot of the book Tabloid Baby, Burt Kearns' landmark exposé and history of the tabloid television era launched twenty years ago by Rupert Murdoch and his brilliant Aussie pirates.  Burt was a lieutenant to the genius television journo, producer and A Current Affair creator Peter Brennan and wrote brutally but affectionately about his mentors as he took readers through the genre's (and his own) highs and lows on its way to being appropriated by the networks.

The genre was also politicized when Republican party operative Roger Ailes got onboard the Fox bandwagon and twisted many of Brennan's tabloid television principles and innovations for blatant political means with Fox News. Now one of Ailes' lieutenants is spreading his own expose. Dan Cooper has written a poison pen letter to his former leader, and posted its rambling "prologue" on the Internet.

Naked Launch is the name of the proposed book, the contents of which seem intended less to inform and expose than to embarrass.

Sure he's got the political blather we've heard time and again:

"Lots of people have dissected the Fox News Channel for evidence of bias. They're all missing the point. Of course it's biased. As you read ahead, you'll understand that in a manner never before understood. This is the point: Fox News is about indoctrination, not bias. The indoctrination was always hidden, as it is in the best advertising. Roger Ailes spent much of his life running political campaigns. He was never a journalist, and in fact he despised journalists. Fox News is not journalism, it’s a political campaign..."

But the guts try to make Ailes look like a demented monster-- a demented, politically incorrect monster!:

"One day during the launch, Roger and I had a huge blowup. It was one of many, but this one shook the building. The tongue-lashing I took from Roger was so personal, and so degrading, and it was done in front of so many of my subordinates, that afterward I stormed into a Fox attorney's office and charged him with abuse... subsequently, several News Corporation lawyers apologized to me for Roger's conduct, and made him apologize to me... Finally I agreed. I walked into Roger's office. He sat me down and told me, with a shocking display of warmth, that I should understand, and this is, like everything else in this story, a word-for-word quote: "I'm a diagnosed paranoid".

...Let me share with you a story about a typical boy's club meeting on a typical day during launch. Roger liked boy's club meetings, five guys at the most, because we could all talk macho and compare the anatomies of women in the office. I was not macho. These meetings made me very nervous. I had no feats of daring to boast about. Roger had parachuted out of airplanes and injured one of those spit-shined leather-clad tootsies. I was too scared to make salacious comments about women in the office. Like everyone, I had taken classes in workplace behavior. Not Roger. 'How about those bazookas on that Indian girl, or whatever the hell she is!' Squirm squirm. 'Pussy masala on the menu today?'...

"News Corporation was full of Australians. Rupert Murdoch was born in Australia. When you worked at News Corporation in those days, wherever you went people were talking that Ozzie way, calling you 'myte' and getting 'aggro' if you pissed them off.

"So, naturally, at News Corporation, you got used to hearing these Ozzies talking. Roger got used to it too, but not like the rest of us. Roger got used to mocking the Australians, because it never occurred to him that he couldn't bully his way out of any sort of offensive behavior..."

Not only was Ailes sexist and insane, but he made fun of the Aussies! Aah, too much...

So is Naked Launch the Tabloid Baby of the Fox News generation? Well, it does take readers inside meetings and behind closed doors, it does not always speak well of the author, and there's an unneccesary shot at legendary and respected Fox News executive Ian Rae (who received an apology from Burt for his depiction in Tabloid Baby).

But from what we've been able to gather, Cooper's tenure with Ailes ended back in 1996-- predating the end of Tabloid Baby's timeline. There's also no documentation for his words, the anguished tone has already led some commentators to suspect that portions may be bullshit, and what we've scanned through seems built more on revenge than confession.

With more than a decade to think about it, we'd venture that Cooper should have thought about doing what Burt did. "First I wrote the angry version. Then I rewrote it."

And he would have been better served had he whipped the raw material into a hot book proposal rather than vomiting it onto the web. For now, Cooper's soliciting donations-- "If you enjoyed the Prologue, please consider paying as little or as much as you'd like"-- like Radiohead did with their new album.

And he's looking less like Burt Kearns and more like Stuart Goldman (look it up).

Who killed Johnny Grant?

Los Angeles Times
January 10, 2008

Hollywood's Johnny Grant dies at 84

Johnny Grant, who visited Hollywood in 1943 as a star-struck serviceman and returned to carve out a niche first as a radio and television personality and then as its honorary mayor and foremost booster, died Wednesday at the age of 84.

Grant appeared to have died of natural causes, authorities said. Shortly before 7 p.m., an associate found him unconscious (in bed) in the penthouse of the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel, where Grant made his home. City paramedics declared him dead at the scene, police said...

San Diego Union Tribune
September 13, 2005

Hollywood's honorary mayor dispels evction rumors

Hollywood's honorary mayor, Johnny Grant, lives in a two-bedroom, two-bath penthouse apartment in the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel with breathtaking views – and pays a modest (by L.A. standards) monthly rent of $2,000.

The arrangement stems from a 1991offer from the hotel's then-manager, who hoped that Grant would rent a 12th-floor suite and dub the building Hollywood's city hall. The suite proved too small and Grant offered to pay to remodel the vacant penthouse and move in there.

Grant a former disc jockey and public affairs director for TV station KTLA, said he signed a lifetime lease to rent the penthouse. The 82-year-old is the building's only permanent tenant.

Now, however, the newly renovated hotel has become the hot spot to party, and his 14th-floor apartment with a private terrace could no doubt command considerably more than Grant is paying.

Recently, word spread along Hollywood Boulevard that Grant was about to be evicted. Grant confronted hotel managers, who assured him he wasn't.

"They said they were happy to have me here," he said.

Grant said he plans to remain in the hotel for the rest of his life. He said he'll house a nurse in his spare bedroom if necessary.

"It's like assisted living," Grant said, referring to the hotel's services. "You lose a button and the people down in the laundry room will take care of it."

He's back! Dr. Ruehl's Realm of Bizarre News


The Realm Of Bizarre News, Episode III

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Why is Inside Edition celebrating its "20th anniversary" when it's only been on air 19 years?

The recent passing of TV salesman and syndicator extraordinaire Roger King brought attention to the tabloid magazine series, Inside Edition, which debuted nineteen years ago, on January 9, 1989 as an imitator of A Current Affair, yet for some reason is celebrating its 20th anniversary today. Inside Edition is most notable for having survived under the radar for so many years, its creators and sellers having long ago come up with a formula of inoffensiveness, packaging and coattail riding that allowed it to sail by unnoticed while its more outrageous and relevant competitors like Affair and Hard Copy were run aground.

The history of the show from its early days hosted by Al Jazeera's David Frost through it most headily tabloid years under a nebbishy and obsequious Bill O'Reilly has been documented in a most entertaining manner in the book Tabloid Baby. For the past dozen years or so, the show has been hosted by the squeaky, traumatized network newsreading castaway Deborah Norville, who, whenever she is hauled before the mainstream media, talks about the show as if it is a top network newsmagazine, is sure to slam the art of tabloid and, if the quotes in today's New York Daily News are to be believed, is definitely existing on a plane other than the temporal tabloid one we inhabit. In other words, when was the last time you saw Inside Edition? When did it last "break news"?

Or put it this way: How nuts is this broad?

"We're hitting new highs with our audience and the demos are really good," Norville told the Daily News. "We've got 5.2 million people watching ... which I think is amazing.

"I got into this business because I'm from the South, I'm a storyteller," said Norville. "And I got into journalism because I really believe in the power of the First Amendment to enable all of us to make change. Good news stories are about problems, and I always felt it was incumbent upon me as a reporter to throw out possible solutions so that the viewers will watch, and if they get jazzed about it, they may be inspired to get involved."

To that end, Norville acknowledges "Inside Edition's" Chrysler minivan exposé, which uncovered faulty door latches and forced the company to fix them, as one of its most successful stories ever.

"When you do stories like that, over a period of time you build an inherent trust with your audience," Norville said. "They think, 'You know what? Those guys are looking out for me. And when there's something that's going on that's superdangerous, they're going to let me know.'"


Norville said that despite hosting "Inside Edition" for almost 13 years, she has yet to tire of the constant influx of information, except maybe when it comes to Britney and Lindsay.


"I'm one of those people who has the attention span of a gnat," said Norville. "But with news, today it's one thing; tomorrow, it's 14 different things. The variety assures that I will never feel like, 'Oh God, here we go again,' although there are certain stories that have this sort of steady drumbeat of repetitiveness that I think all of us start rolling our eyes about after a while-- Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan being high on that list."

But at the end of the day, whatever they report on, Norville is confident viewers will be satisfied with the program.
"Whenever the big news story happens, we'll be on it like white on rice," Norville said. "We'll have stuff that you won't see anywhere else, and at the end of the hour, I think it's highly unlikely that you'll regret you spent your time watching our show."

Israel Baseball League keeps the blinders on

What's that Yiddish word? Meshugeneh?

No-- chutzpah.

That's it! Chutzpah!

The guys behind the Israel Baseball League sure do have a lot of chutzpah! Despite reports of a first season debt that tops a million US dollars, a founder who few want to work with, lots of former contributors out to remake Israel's baseball dream on their own, and a general consensus that there probably won't be professional baseball in Israel in 2008, the IBL continues to press forward as if everything is, well, kosher.

In fact, only hours ago, a new entry appeared on the revived IBL website, bringing us up-to-date on the tryouts that took place last month in Miami:

01/07/2008 10:03 PM
Miami Florida-

The Israel Baseball League held is second successful tryout of the off-season in anticipation of the 2008 baseball season in Israel. The tryout, held in Miami, and run by Dan Duquette, featured former minor league pitchers and some excellent players with college level experience. "We hope to sign at least six to eight players from this tryout to go along with the eight we are going to sign from the tryouts in Hinsdale," said Dan Duquette following the workout. "With the number of players who will be returning from last season," said Bryan Pinchuk, Assistant Director of Player Personnel, "we are right on target to accomplish our number one goal of the off-season, namely to upgrade the already high level of play in the IBL." Future tryouts are scheduled for the Dominican Republic and Los Angeles in the upcoming months.

Now, the reports we got from the tryouts were not so rosy ("About thirty hopefuls showed up... about two players displayed an inkling of talent, yet none is destined to get an El Al coach ticket to a summer of fun."), but there you go.

Meanwhile, the IBL site also advertises the "Next Game":

Modi'in Miracle
@ Bet Shemesh Blue Sox
06/22/2008
06:00 PM
and contains a FAN POLL:

What do you think is the most impressive accomplishment
in the IBL's inaugural season?


* Esequier Pie throwing two no-hitters in one season

* Eladio Rodriguez hitting .461 with 16HR, 44 RBI in 34 G

* The Bet Shemesh Blue Sox winning the IBL Championship
and never falling below first place the entire season

Which leads us to ask: What do YOU think is the most impressive accomplishment in the IBL's inaugural season?

And be sure to let us know the date of the Los Angeles tryouts. We'll be there, with bagels.

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

New feature: Please deface our photos



One of Tabloid Baby's good pals and advisers turned us on to a new feature called PhotoCrank that allows you to comment on stories in a whole new way-- by providing captions, comments, bubbles, graphics and tags by. Lovely Carla Bruni is the first victim. Should it stay or should it go? We think the PhotoCrank people did this initial handiwork, but if this quality keeps up, we'll be having a contest every month and give away prizes. Anyway, we think you need to click the permalink (time stamp) on a story for the crank widgets to show up on the photos. If anyone know better, please share...




And a tip of the Tabloid Baby hat to JB for the tip...

We interrupt this program to bring you an important message from Dr. Ruehl!


Tabloid Baby pal, contributor, columnist and Television & Film Personality of 2007, Dr. Franklin Ruehl, Ph.D kicks off 2008 in style as spokesman for Fuel TV, the fast-growing action and sports cable and satellite network.


At last, the hipsters are catching on to what we at Tabloid Baby have known for years: Dr. Ruehl is a wizard, a true star!

Yes! Yes! Yes!

So what does Sarkozy see in Carla Bruni?


Like most everyone else in tabloidland, we first knew of Carla Bruni as Mick Jagger's girlfriend. So it was a surprise a few years back when we ran into her music. It turns out that Carla's got a real knack for it, with a few albums of Gainsbourgy French pop songs, certainly pulls it off a lot more convincingly than Belinda Carlisle and apparently has even sold a couple of million albums in Europe.



Some other reasons why French President Nick Sarkozy is getting all Tom Cruisey about the 40-year-old can be found here, on this misguided Tabloid Baby "tribute" site.

Beware. NSFW. She's naked.


Monday, January 07, 2008

Found! The 34D Lara Logan swimsuit photos


After a long search, the Tabloid Baby staff has dug up some of the photos that explain why every story written about CBS News chief foreign correspondent Lara Logan includes a description of her as a "former swimsuit model"-- and, most important, why the globe trotting sex symbol is known in the British tabloids as "34D Lara."


These photos were supposedly taken during her days as "student and part-time model," and though her superiors and colleagues take pains to remind us that the 36-year-old South African is a courageous, experienced and knowledgeable journalist, it should pointed out that the photos were first mentioned slyly by Lara herself during an interview when her career was still in a need of traction on the uphill climb, and that despite any objections on the grounds of sexism, the "swimsuit issue" is actually kept alive by CBS News publicists and again, Lara herself, as in yesterday's publicity blitz, in which the New York Times pointed out that when she arrived in Pakistan over the weekend for an exclusive interview with president Pervez Musharraf, "her suitcase with bikinis and other beachwear made it to Islamabad; the suitcase with the rest of her clothes did not."

Sunday, January 06, 2008

CBS' 34D Lara flaunts what Katie Couric cannot

That Lara Logan is the kind of "chief foreign correspondent" we like. She's got a Marvel Comics name, an exotic accent and doesn't have a mug like Christina Amanpour. And now the sexy CBS newsgal, star of the Katie Couric evening news show, and former bikini model known in the British tabs as "34D Lara," is making news for landing an exclusive interview with Pakistan president Pervez Musharraf for tonight's 60 Minutes.

Lara has worked hard to pretend to try to escape the sex kitten image and her swimsuit modelling past, so it's ver-r-r-r-ry interesting that in a nod to all the perv-ez among her fanbase, she and the CBS publicity machine included in the latest "how I got that scoop" story that Lara was "vacationing on a beach near her South African hometown when she received a message on her BlackBerry telling her of the (Bhutto) attack in Rawalpindi," and that when she arrived in Pakistan for the major news coup, "her suitcase with bikinis and other beachwear made it to Islamabad; the suitcase with the rest of her clothes did not."

Sorry. Did you miss that?

"Her suitcase with bikinis
and other beachwear
made it to Islamabad."


Now, that's Tabloid 101! And that's a shot across the bow. Who needs a Burberry when you travel on assignment with a suitcase full of bikinis? And, as we've been advising in our free consultation to CBS News since the days Katie Couric (left) was first being considered for the Evening News gig, who needs Katie when you've got a real, fearless, experienced globetrotting 21st century superstar sexpot reporter with such a great future behind her?

"PLEASE RETURN BABY JESUS"


A tip of the Tabloid Baby hat to Sam for the eagle eye...

Leno & Kimmel's dangerous liaison


Passive-aggressive late night TV host Jay Leno and Sarah Silverman's boyfriend/Adam Carolla's mentor Jimmy Kimmel are both angry that David Letterman made a sidedeal with the Writers Guild of America that allowed his writers to go back to work. Both hosts, WGA members, crossed picket lines to return to work last week without writers. Leno, as we know, has been writing (or getting help writing) his nightly monologue in defiance of union rules. Kimmel, who mines the "working slug" "lucky to be on television" image, has raged publicly against the restrictions.

According to the New York Times, "in an unusual act of unity emerging from the screenwriters’ strike, two of television’s late-night hosts, Jay Leno of NBC and Jimmy Kimmel of ABC, will appear on each other’s shows on Thursday... The two hosts and their networks will announce the arrangement on Monday...

"Neither host has appeared on the other’s show, but in the course of meetings with the writers’ guild over what the hosts would be permitted to do and telephone discussions between the shows about mutual interests, Mr. Leno and Mr. Kimmel established a relationship..."


These guys know the rules and how the game is played. Whatever game they're playing behind the scenes is a move into dangerous territory.

Saturday, January 05, 2008

IBL's Feingold wants Baras in the Israel Baseball mix; offers to serve as mediator among factions

In light of the troubles engulfing the Israel Baseball League and the likelihood that its mismanagement, ineptitude, greed and scandals will result in empty diamonds in Israel in 2008, we sought comment-- well, we actually put out a public call for comment-- from the senior players who stepped forward as the biggest apologists for the million-dollars-in-debt IBL-- as well as loudest namecallers when it came to the excellent investigative and journalistic work of Our Man Elli in Israel and if we must say, the Tabloid Baby staff.

Yesterday, Eric Holtz, the old man of the Bet Shemesh Blue Sox, sent along his comments, reaffirming his faith in the IBL and his hope that "the IBL will be able to crawl out from it's financial debt to get back to doing what it intended to do from the get-go (Play Baseball)."

This morning, his colleague Leon Feingold from the Netanya Tigers (also renowned as a professional competitive eater), a major critic of our coverage-- leads off with a dig at us, then digs into the issue at hand:

Boychik, how can I turn down an invitation like that? Unlike TabloidBaby, I'd hate to leave readers disappointed by my contributions, or lack thereof.

If baseball is to succeed in Israel, as it absolutely should once done correctly, it will involve a lot of people working together to build on the positives of last season (of which there were many, although you'd never know that from reading here) and overcoming the negatives (of which there were just as many).

Somewhere in the IBL blogosphere this week, someone commented about the importance of everyone pulling on the same rope. That allusion stuck with me for some reason, and I maintain that all those who wish to see baseball succeed are trying to reach that common goal by pulling on different ropes - which cannot work, and certainly is not the most efficient solution.


The irony I see is not that the different parties have different ideas about how a league should be run, so much as there are many people who had no patience for the problems with the current league and wanted to tear it down and start from scratch with a better business plan, more transparency, etc... but instead of working WITH the people already there, have decided to compete and attempt what is essentially a hostile takeover where none was really necessary. I know Larry Baras reasonably well, and after all he poured of his own time and money and energy into making this league a reality, there was DEFINITELY a bipartisan way to fix the problems from within. It's not just about money, or fame, or records, or credit, or individuals. It's about making something beautiful and culturally significant happen on an international and historical scale, and we're so very close to the tipping point where this can really take hold. Some people in BOTH groups just didn't want to do things any way but their own, and I believe it is their stubbornness and insistence in doing everything their way that has created two apparently opposing camps divided by that common goal.


In the school of thought to which I adhere, there is STILL a narrow window to use all the positives everyone brings to the table - Baras, Goldklang, Perlman, Berger, Rosen, Holtz, Rolhaus, Kurtzer, Duquette, Zimbalist, and many more - to do what SHOULD have been done in the beginning: get everyone with a part of the same rope in their hands, and find a way to pull together. I'd love to get everyone in the same room at the same time and force them to hash it out like grownups, or at the very least like young adults. I'd volunteer to mediate, although I'm sure we can get a more experienced, well-known expert to step in and work out a way to have everyone involved who wants to be, and present a unified front against any new challenges that will face the league from outside, rather than self-immolate via infighting.


In closing, it's axiomatic that we can't change the past, but we can learn from it and find a way to shape the future. There's not much time left before a solid framework needs to be in place for next season, but I know enough about the people who want this to succeed, that I believe we have enough time to make it happen.


After all, as everyone knows, there's no time limit in baseball.


Leon Feingold

Thanks, Leon and Eric! No hard feelings. In fact, we offer you a tip of the Tabloid Baby hat!

Friday, January 04, 2008

Fact: Those soulless, irresponsible queens at TMZ won't be happy until Britney Spears is dead


This whole Britney Spears mess is pretty pathetic, isn't it? Sad. Sad that her mental illness has been allowed to flourish and sadder still that executives at multinational conglomerates finance gossip operations that stuff SUVs with undocumented laborers, registered sex offenders and streetboytoy amateurs with cameras to careen through city streets chasing and harassing Spears and other unstable young women, in pursuit of a possible confrontation, crash or crotch shot, or at least an image through the windscreen -- or in this latest case, an ambulance window.


And nothing's sadder than the clueless kids and their amoral, immoral keepers at the corporate porn-pushing gossip site TMZ.com and its whitewashed syndicated television spinoff, which detail Britney Spears' comings and goings with a deranged pervy glee, stating with authority that her problems are not drug-related but "mental"-- and yet continuing to torment and make fun of her.

TMZ's flip coverage of the pitiable Frances Farmerlike breakdown-- characterizing the ambulance ride as "Crazytown Express," describing her spied-upon reactions in medical and police custody as "shameless" and, most disturbingly, declaring proudly that their thuggish camera pointers managed to push through the other paps to flash cameras in the frightened face of Britney's two-year-old son Sean Preston as professionals took the baby to the hospital-- betray the heartless, soulless, cruel, cynical, hateful, envious, pathetic, wrongheaded, embarrassing nature of the operation even more than frontman Harvey Levin's (Tabloid Baby's 2007 Journalist of The Year) camp television appearances this morning, celebrating the incident as some sort of "scoop."

Read the following posts from the TMZ website, wonder why any station manager would allow the TMZ television show on his television station, realize that Harvey and his boys really won't be happy until Britney becomes their Anna Nicole (whose blood is on the hands of the botoxed rival Entertainment Tonight) and ask how its come to this:

Cops Called to Brit's House for "Custody Dispute"
Posted Jan 4th 2008 12:36AM by TMZ Staff

TMZ has confirmed that LAPD has been called to Britney Spears' house in Beverly Hills for what we're being told is a "family custody dispute."

More Cops, Ambulance Now at Spears' House!
Posted Jan 4th 2008 1:24AM by TMZ Staff

UPDATE: Another ambulance, more fire trucks and several additional police cars have just rolled up to Britney's house. One person on the ground described the situation to us as "scary."

Holy Kramer vs. Kramer!

TMZ is at Britney's house in Beverly Hills as several more police cars, fire trucks, an ambulance and a police chopper have now all descended on the popwreck's humble abode. Don't let 'em git me!!


Pandemonium Outside Brit's Madhouse
Posted Jan 4th 2008 7:55AM by TMZ Staff

"Chaotic" doesn't even begin to describe the clusterf**k that went on around Britney Spears' home tonight as the popwreck was taken away to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in an ambulance.

TMZ was there -- and man was it crazazy!!! Our cameras also caught Sean Preston being taken away in a black VW and a throng of paparazzi trying to get the money shot.

Britney Wheeled Out on a Gurney!!
Posted Jan 4th 2008 10:38AM by TMZ Staff

OMG THE DRAMA! TMZ is there as Britney Spears was just wheeled out of her home on a gurney by paramedics. Look at that shot of her inside the ambulance -- she's frickin' smiling! Why God, why?!?

Once in the ambulance, paramedics can be seen trying to strap her legs down before taking off.

We're told Britney is being taken to a local hospital on a "medical hold" -- essentially a mental evaluation. Cops found her earlier this evening at her home under the influence of an "unknown substance."

Cops were called to the popnightmare's home in Beverly Hills this evening, after she reportedly refused to return custody of her two kids to their father's bodyguard. Oh, the insanity of it all!

UPDATE: Britney has arrived at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. We're told as she was brought out of the ambulance, she flipped off the waiting paparazzi. Oh my God. That Britney's shameless!


What do you think?

Israel Baseball: Holtz keeps on the sunny side

Recent grim news about the sad state of the Israel Baseball League, its million dollar debt, a decree by the formerly uninterested Jerusalem Post that the league's first season was a failure and the unlikely prospects for Israel baseball in 2008 led us to wonder about the reaction from the two IBL players who were most vocal in support of IBL management-- and critical of Our Man Elli in Israel and his coverage of the season's foibles and post-season scandals.

Leon Feingold, the Netanya Tigers pitcher and competitive eater called Our Man Elli and the Tabloid Baby team "mudslinging, smarmy, sensationalist, no-talent gossip-column rejects," while aging Bet Shemesh Blue Sox shortstop Eric Holtz (above right) went further-- defending founder Larry Baras, shrugging off a bounced paycheck, and stating that Elli "could be the lowest level of Human Life in a reporter that I have ever seen."

Today, Holtz, the self described "Glass Half-Full Guy," writes in:

My response is this:

I had a great experience, I got to meet wonderful people. I was re-introduced to my own heritage and got nine weeks to visit a beautiful land, meet warm Israeli people and do what I love most-Play/Manage Baseball. I have made life-long friends and will continue to look back and smile on the entire experience. Tabloid did not get Thanks from Mothers and fathers of Children who Thanked Us for "Making their Summer." That was an incredible feeling. Elli/Tabloid Baby will never get to feel something like that.

120 st(r)angers met with one thing in common and bonded into something special.That will never be taken away from anyone who experienced this. I do hope that Baseball continues in Israel. It will take time to gain trust, interest and ent(h)usiasm, but Soccer is still st(r)uggling here in the U.S. decades after it was introduced. On the business side, almost every new league is in the red when starting out, hopefully the IBL will be able to crawl out from it's financial debt to get back to doing what it intended to do from the get-go (Play Baseball).

I hope this answers your question as to "What would Eric say"? As now I have to get back to what is important in my life-- Fathering my 3 children and running my manufacturing business.

I wish Everyone a Happy Healthy and Prosperous 2008.

Eric Holtz

Leon? You're on deck, bubbala.

Dr. Ruehl's Realm of Bizarre News



The Realm Of Bizarre News, Episode II

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

While Carolla gets a third chance to make his radio show work, his "news girl" could use a new photo


Were you listening this morning? We missed it, but apparently radio blowhard Adam Carolla returned for a third year of turning away listeners from Howard Stern's old radio slot in Los Angeles, but without the benefit of sharp, compelling, relevance-infusing radio veteran Danny Bonaduce (Tabloid Baby's Radio Personality of 2007) to keep things real. That's because Carolla ran a backstabbing campaign to get Bonaduce, whose presence raised the ratings in Carolla's second year (and chance), off the show.

Of course, Carolla has his female "news girl" (as she calls herself) back on board. Teresa Strasser plays the part of the whiny, servile, stereotypically unlucky-at-love "Jewish princess," and her positioning in the ad on the Carolla website (top) shows she definitely knows her place. Strasser also has a minor role in the syndicated television series based on the corporate porn-pushing gossip site, TMZ.com (where she also knows her place), but she apparently only has one air-brushed "sexy picture" that the ad department has to use and re-use every time there's a new ad campaign or change in line-up (above). They flip it and cut it and move it around, but it's the same shot (see yet more versions on her MySpace page here and website here). But that's how Carolla and his very limited dorky male audience like her.  Airbrushed and pretend-sultry-- and way in the background.

Anyway, did you hear the Carolla show? Or Bonaduce's afternoon entry?  Let us know.

As WGA members, we second that emotion


A tip of the Tabloid Baby hat to Nikki Finke for the coverage and photo.

Dr. Ruehl schools LA Times on true 'Legend'


As we've told you before, Tabloid Baby pal, contributor, columnist and Television & Film Personality of 2007, Dr. Franklin Ruehl Ph.D, is a man of letters-- having had 26 of his letters to the editor published by the Los Angeles Times alone. But his latest note of outrage to the lax lady's calendar section was left unrun (and we hope it's not because of his connection to Tabloid Baby!) So here it is, concerning an error of omission in the Times' review of the new blockbuster film, I Am Legend:

Dear Editor:

Absolutely unconscionable! No acknowledgment whatsoever was made of Vincent Price's tour de force performance in 1964's
"The Last Man On Earth" (the first cinematic incarnation of the novella, "I Am Legend") in Carina Chocano's critique of Will Smith's new movie (Calendar, December 14, "The Last Man is a 'Legend'").

Price's entry was shot in black-and-white to create the apropos film noir ambience and was abetted by an ideal hauntingly eerie musical score. Price exquisitely conveyed the gut-wrenching trauma of a father trying to prevent his plague-ridden child from being tossed into a mass grave. Then, he expressed unrelenting grief as he buried his dead wife in a secret grave followed by sheer terror as she returned as a vampire thirsting for his blood.

Finally, as he lay mortally wounded with a spear lodged in his chest, he proclaimed that he, indeed, was "the last man on earth."

So, I submit that any discussion of "I Am Legend" is pitifully incomplete without inclusion of this 1964 masterpiece!

(For the record, I personally felt that Charlton Heston's 1971 color version, "The Omega Man," laden as it was with a heavy dose of violence, could not compare.)


May the Power of the Cosmos be with You!


Dr.Franklin Ruehl, Ph.D.


(Note: I am host of the cable access show, "Mysteries From Beyond The Other Dominion," where I regularly critique entries from the horror/sci-fi/mystery genre.)

Jerusalem Post: "The IBL was not a success"

The Jerusalem Post has been playing catch-up with Our Man Elli in Israel and our coverage of the Israel Baseball League for almost six months now (when they even bothered to cover the story at all). Which is probably why, in wake of our most recent post predicting a ball-free summer of 2008 in the Holy Land, JP columnist Jeremy Last gives us no credit as he comes in last, but powerfuly, with a commentary that will be unwelcome by anyone who hopes to see baseball rise in Israel again:






Jan 2, 2008

The Last Word:
Can 2007's disappointments be overturned

By JEREMY LAST


There were numerous success stories in Israeli sports in 2007, many of which have been highlighted in these pages over the last few weeks. But at the same time that Betar Jerusalem was being molded into a championship winning side and Shahar Pe'er was smashing away her opposition, there were a number of teams and organizations which failed to live up to their expectations...

Disappointments included... the extremely hyped Israel Baseball League...

The Israel Baseball League was another of the prominent flops of last year. While those running the league may protest that it was only the first year and the league was initially aimed at Americans, that was the biggest problem and led to practically empty stands for many games.

The fact is the IBL was not a success. It was hyped and hyped and promoted, but to the wrong people. By the end of the summer few Israelis still had any idea the league existed. And it was beset with problems which never should have arisen. From the late realization that the floodlights at Kibbutz Gezer were not strong enough, forcing games to finish early, to the complaints from the players about the conditions at their living quarters, the league was not run in the professional manner it should have been.

It must have been a relief for many of the top IBL personnel when they finally resigned in November. Ex-IBL commissioner Daniel Kurtzer, ex-PR representative Marty Appel and other members of the advisory board soon saw that "the league's finances and business operations were not handled in a... professional manner" Founder Larry Baras has promised that the IBL will return this summer, and even released a schedule, but there will be no point even bothering if the league is not managed correctly, marketed properly to local Israelis and more Israelis are not given the chance to play. Otherwise the failures will just continue in 2008.

In light of this recent turn of events, it will be interesting to hear the response from IBL apologists like Eric Holtz and Leon Feingold.

Prediction: No pro baseball for Israel in 2008

2008 has dawned with a big question mark and Joe Btfsplk cloud over the future of baseball in Israel. And if we may go all Carnac on your asses, we will take a leap of cynicism and predict there will be no professional baseball in Israel this year, thanks to the mess left behind by the Israel Baseball League in the summer of ’07.

And don’t blame Our Man Elli.

He merely reported (and a monumental report it was) the facts of a debacle of a season that somehow everyone took seriously only after New York Times columnist Murray Chass took all of Elli’s droppings and stepped in last week to report that the IBL owes a lot more than a few bounced paychecks and ice cube bills— a debt that reaches, and by our sources’ accounts, surpasses, one million US dollars (more on that to come)-- and badwill that guarantees that embattled IBL founder Larry Baras will not be involved in an IBL sophomore season whenever and if ever that may take place, or for that matter, set foot in Israel, where the ankle above that foot would probably be clamped with a shackle as soon as he steps out of the jetway.

Yet, the charade continues, with an announcement of a 2008 IBL schedule, followed by bobbled IBL tryouts in Miami a couple of weeks back, under the watchful eye of league president and local attorney Martin Berger and his operations director Dan Duquette. About thirty hopefuls showed up. Our scouts tell us about two players displayed an inkling of talent, yet none is destined to get an El Al coach ticket to a summer of fun.

And, yes, Larry Baras was nowhere to be seen.

The coalition of the wishing described by Chass last week (“mediators” led by former IBL commissioner Dan Kurtzer and former advisers Marvin Goldklang (a minor league team owner and limited partner in the Yankees) and (Smith College economics prof) Andrew Zimbalist hope to pull together all the potential movers— and derail the rival Israel Professional Baseball League rebels in the process—in a meeting later this month.

They also want Baras out. Sources tell Tabloid Baby that the Boston businessman who’s been hit by a federal securities fraud lawsuit connected to his IBL startup and who bounced paychecks to players and left vendors hanging, is claiming he’s been out of pocket to the tune of 90,000 US dollars.

The ones trying to restart the league may pay him off and send him back to his bagel-stuffing business. But sources say Baras may hold out for more. Don’t fall for his woe-is-me act, they tell us. Baras will look to leave with his pockets stuffed with cash the same way his UnHoley Bagels are filled with cream cheese.

But in the wake of the IBL’s first season, the biggest problem will be getting anyone in Israel to cooperate with mercenary carpetbaggers looking to skim more shekels from Holy Land (baseball) diamonds. Right now, it’s safe to say that just about no one in Israel trusts the IBL, nor will they do business with it-- not Gezer, not Baptist Village, not vendors, not landscapers, not television channels-- not anyone, even in the unlikely scenario that Baras raises the money to get out of debt and start fresh. In fact, most every Israeli will likely be gun-shy about working with anyone who utters the word beysbol (baseball).

Meanwhile, another question many have been asking is why Berger and Duquette are still tied in with Baras. We know Duquette lost out on the Pittsburgh Pirates GM gig, which would have sent him packing from the IBL faster than spoiled baba ghanoush through a digestive system. But he can't now. Duquette owns about a quarter of the league, and is owed a lot of money, and so is Berger. Lots.

So for now, think Bagelstock and Bloom. And Bloom. That’s where we're all standing, and where the future of baseball in Israel is not.


Stay tuned here, and thanks for all the tips and a tip of the Tabloid Baby hat to you all.

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

TMZ kicks off 2008 in fine form!

The first post of the new year from the corporate porn-pushing gossip site TMZ.com tells of singing star Mariah Carey being a few seconds late in counting down to the New Year at the TAO nightclub in Las Vegas. The headline even topped their New Years Eve embarrassment, "Ex-Idol Constantine Toots His Skin Flute":

Mariah Carey: Clock Sucker

Yes, that's the talent that an injection of millions of dollars from Time-Warner and AOL buys you on the Internet these days.

It's also what's obviously on the flighty minds of the TMZ boys in their West Hollywood aerie the morning after last night's Bacchanalian revels (no cunning linguists, they), showing that our decision to honor TMZ queen Harvey Levin as Tabloid Baby's 2007 Journalist of The Year was right on the money.

We can't wait for the next twelve months.