US TV show to bend over for Heather Mills

Now that she’s fleeced poor old Paul McCartney, one-legged former porn model and alleged one-time call girl Heather Mills is working once again to use the compliant American media to rake in more millions while legitimizing her deceptions and fantasies to an unwary public.

Days after landing a the of confusing the. Days after landing £24million for a four-year marriage that humiliated poor old Paul McCartney, Heather is still railing against the generous judge who also labeled her a Pornocchio fantasist (we said it first), and now the British tabloids are reporting she’s hired “feminist” lawyer Gloria Allred (who’s really a very sweet person when the cameras are turned off) to broker a million dollar American TV deal in which Heather will hop around the settlement’s confidentiality clause by having her sister Fiona (the portrait to Heather’s Dorian Gray) dish out the dirty details of the Macca-Mucca marriage to a show like 20/20 or Entertainment Tonight.

And you can be assured in advance: Heather's people will write the story. It's the norm in backroom deals like this for the news organization to agree to ground rules, guaranteeing that any reportage will be very "pro Heather," and that certain unsavory issues will not be broached or even circled.

And they'll deny paying for the interview, claiming that any money changing hands was for exclusive video or photos.

They'll be lying.

So if anyone saw humour or irony when Heather hopped onto Dancing with The Stars last year, identified only as a “charity campaigner,” or was puzzled back in November 2006 when the tabloid show Extra paid for a Heather exclusive that avoided all talk of the divorce, well, you ain’t seen nothing yet. Stay tuned for American news and infotainment TV hypocrisy,where the “truth” goes to the highest bidder.

See Heather Mills’ very NSFW nude photos here.

And while we're at it, a tip of the Tabloid Baby hat to the hacks at the UK Sun, who've had so much fun advancing this story...