Ty will live in infamy as a True Hollywood Story

With vacuous swill like the syndicated series based on the corporate porn-pushing gossip site TMZ.com, tired corrupt infotainment standbys still dressing up pretty slim women in fatsuits, network news operations making millions with a politically-correct, neutered and scored version of the original genre, and writers considered to be at the bottom of every one of the heaps (Top Tip: The best writing in television these days can be found on BBC America, in Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares-- check it out and agree), it's hard to find good tabloid on television these days.

But not impossible. Still standing heads above the rest when it comes to drama, pacing and the word: E!'s Entertainment's True Hollywood Story-- thanks in no small part to veteran producer Michael Lynn, the king of true Hollywood, the Ken Burns of Hollywood degradation, the Kenneth Tynan of cheap, disposable show business lives-- the Oliver Stone of longform reality television.

Michael has a new Hollywod Story in store for this weekend. And the combination of its excellence and unlikely subject brings the franchise to a new level. Watch what Michael Lynn and crew do with the life of a Ty Pennington. Ty the F Who? you may ask. The host of ABC's Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, the Jim Varney-Ryan Seacrest-Martha Stewart morph may be such a cypher to most of the public that cynics can be forgiven for assuming he got himself a drunk driving arrest in May just so his True Hollywod Story would have the proper arc.

In the deft hands of Michael Lynn, look for Ty Pennington to be as intriguing as the worst of them:

"Growing up, Ty was an unruly child who... was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder... Ty funneled his excess energy into developing his passion and craft for remodeling homes. Blessed with good looks, he did a brief stint in modeling... Though Ty seemed like a nearly perfect guy, a recent DUI charge shocked his most devoted fans...

Yes!

Michael tells us this show is upbeat and inspirational-- but it's got that drunk driving arrest and another low point or two. It also makes a bit of E! True Hollywood History itself, as it is the very first cold open without narration. Soundbites and music will draw you in... and flaks can quote Tabloid Baby here: "It's E!'s best Cold Open ever! We might even forgive the network for its conflict of interest in spreading lies about and dumping on the trailer for The Michael Lohan Reality Project!"

"Ty Pennington: True Hollywood Story" premieres this Saturday, November 17th, at 6 PM. If you can't catch the premiere, the show will air again, and again... as E! churns Pennington into Hollywood Babylon History... beginning Sunday at 3 pm... Monday at 2 am (for us insomniacs)... Tuesday at 6 pm and Friday at one in the afternoon.