Monday, November 19, 2007

Our Man Elli responds to his nomination as commissioner of the new Israel baseball league

"I'm not in the running for any position
in the new league, the old league or any league."


Our Man Elli in Israel, whose exclusive reports on the Israel Baseball League culminated in the implosion of the IBL and the phoenix-like birth of the new Israel Professional Baseball League, has responded to his nomination yesterday as commissioner of the new IPBL:

"Look, guys, I'm flattered. But I'm also busy!" Mr. Wohlgelernter insisted. "I'm not in the running for any position in the new league, the old league or any league. Just as my place is in the press box, not the batter's box, it's not in the commissioner's seat. It's in what I consider to be the catbird seat-- in the stands, on the bus, talking with the players and coaches, getting the stories and living the baseball life the way I've lived it since I was a kid at Yankee Stadium.

"How am I supposed to phrase it? 'If nominated I will not run; if elected I will not serve.' I'm very happy with my role as a journalist, and I'm content looking forward to seeing as many games as I can as a consummate baseball fan, and watching outstanding professional ballplayers.

"And I wish them both the best. I wish the IBL and the IPBL as much success as possible. I want them to spread the great game of baseball to Israelis across the country."

Sorry, Elli. the nomination stands!

We say:

Elli Wohlgelernter for commissioner of the IPBL!


El-li! Eli-li! El-li!

(Cut this out and post it wherever baseball is spoken:)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He's the right man for the job!


Elect

ELLI
WOHLGELERNTER

Commissioner

of the
Israel Professional
Baseball League

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6 comments:

  1. "And I wish them both the best. I wish the IBL and the IPBL as much success as possible. I want them to spread the great game of baseball to Israelis across the country."

    Where is Elli and what have you done to him?

    ReplyDelete
  2. TRIBUNE INVESTIGATION: HIDDEN HAZARDS

    Finger-pointing furious in deal gone sour
    Magnetix becomes a major problem for its new owner
    By Patricia Callahan | Tribune staff reporter
    May 7, 2007
    Article tools
    E-mail Share
    Digg Del.icio.us Facebook Fark Google Newsvine Reddit Yahoo Print Single page view Reprints Reader feedback Text size: Magnetix building sets were such hot sellers for Rose Art Industries that a rival toymaker bought the family-owned company. Now the legacy of that toy is haunting Mega Brands, the Canadian firm that purchased Rose Art.

    Mega Brands officials allege in a lawsuit that Jeffrey and Lawrence Rosen -- the brothers who sold them Rose Art, then led that division after the merger -- didn't fix the problems with the dangerous toy in part because they didn't want to jeopardize personal multimillion-dollar payouts tied to profit targets.

    Kenny Sweet Jr., a suburban Seattle toddler, died, and at least 27 other children suffered serious intestinal injuries after swallowing tiny magnets that fell out of Magnetix toys.

    Hey Wogelegereteree ere or whatever your friggin name is here is another scoop for you!!!!!!


    lets see you go after this guy before he screws up the league also

    ReplyDelete
  3. making fun of someones last name is no way to get him to work FOR YOU.

    ReplyDelete
  4. work FOR ME. I pass. He will only write one time about these upsetting allegations and not investigate anymore. You knw why, because the great investigative reporter does have a 'stooly' or rich nut did to feed him with info..

    ReplyDelete
  5. "You knw why, because the great investigative reporter does have a 'stooly' or rich nut did to feed him with info.."

    Ummm is that a problem? How do you think stories are written? Through mindreading? It's through sources, dummy.

    Elli could write a story based on what people are thinking but that wouldn't be very accurate. It probably would include Larry Baras and martin berger doubleteaming a sheep picked out by dan duquette.

    think about that image for a second...

    one more...

    alright enough of that.


    Instead Elli gets and reports facts. He may cherry pick them and slant the facts ina way that suits him but if the facts were complimentary to the league, this website would probably move on to OJ by now.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Cudos. That image of Baras and Berger doing a sheep picked out by Dan Duquette is priceless.

    ReplyDelete