Crazy amputee and former porn model Heather Mills gets some more publicity in the UK tonight as a Channel 4 documentary special, “Heather Mills: What Really Happened,” sorts through the stories, lies, legends, accusations and escapades of and about a self-made public figure who, though not loved, is definitely one of the most colorful characters in pop culture. Sounds like good stuff, if only because Channel 4 docos turn out to be a lot more sordid and straightforward than the bowdlerized judgmental tabloid churned out by the 20/20 and Dateline pieces we get here (the syndicated tabloid shows simply agree to let the subject call the shots in exchange for exclusivity). And we do like how they have the balls to not put a question mark at the end of the title because we can only attempt to sort out the “truth” among all the stories that’ve come out about the one-legged fantasist since she hooked with poor old mourning Paul McCartney and fleeced him for £24 million.
Topping the list tonight is a probe into the many stories about Heather working as a “high class” call girl in her earlier days, an accusation backed by many an interview with a former hooker who’s claimed to have worked with Heather but whose veracity could always be challenged because of the British tabloids’ practice of paying for interviews (it makes it all the easier for them to take the gist of an interview and make up the quotes). Topping the bill tonight is a Geordie ex-vice girl named Denise who reminisces about her and Heather’s time together in the 1980s when she alleges they sold their bodies for sex and raked in big money.
The 44-year-old former model has some corkers of quotes:“We have a naughty background. We went into high-class prostitution behind closed doors.
There were 10 of us. We are select girls from Newcastle and we kept it close-knit with three of the most powerful men in the world. (A tip of the Tabloid Baby hat to the late Kerry Packer for making that list).
They were the big fish. We also had others who were classed as sugar daddies.
We used to get a lot of jewellery as gifts – rings, watches, Bulgari bracelets, cars. The world was our oyster. We enjoyed it.
“We would have full-on sex with a guy. We’d do girlie-girlie scenes. Always girlie-girlie scenes. I mean 99.9% of men like a girlie- girlie scene. It’s a play act. You need to be an actress. Whatever you want out of life, you’ve got to act for.
“No-one knew what we did and we didn’t expect it would come out. I don’t look on it as sleazy. It was experiencing something we couldn’t have experienced if we hadn’t done this. I mean working-class women wouldn’t get £10,000 a night. People go out in Newcastle and do it for free, then can’t remember the next day who they have been with.”
“We would have full-on sex with a guy. We’d do girlie-girlie scenes. Always girlie-girlie scenes. I mean 99.9% of men like a girlie- girlie scene. It’s a play act. You need to be an actress. Whatever you want out of life, you’ve got to act for.
“No-one knew what we did and we didn’t expect it would come out. I don’t look on it as sleazy. It was experiencing something we couldn’t have experienced if we hadn’t done this. I mean working-class women wouldn’t get £10,000 a night. People go out in Newcastle and do it for free, then can’t remember the next day who they have been with.”
Heather’s denied it. But you can go here and here and here on this misguided and unauthorized Tabloid Baby “tribute” site for lots more saucy, naked and definitely NSFW photos of Heather Mills, woman who could be a creation of Thackery or Dickens and whose picaresque adventures are not over yet.
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